I had planned to do a long, excruciatingly detailed post this afternoon on how I spent every second of the holiday weekend - at the beach, in the garden, walking the dog, watching the Law & Order marathon on TNT, etc., but Geraldine Ferraro had to go and ruin it for me.
Asked by Fox News Channel's Shepard Smith about media bias in recent presidential campaign coverage, Ferraro had this to say: "All the surrogates that they (the Obama campaign) had out there, from the black journalists — you know, have you read Bob Herbert recently in the past six months? There wasn't one column that had anything decent to say about Hillary."
So it's true. Somehow the former Democratic Vice Presidential candidate learned of the conspiracy among black journalists AKA Obama surrogates to poison the minds of the news consuming public and force you all at figurative gunpoint to believe that Barack Obama is the second coming and that when he stepped in a puddle last week while climbing out of his limo, he was actually walking on water.
This can only mean one thing: Undercover Brother was captured and tortured by the Clinton campaign into revealing the secrets of the Da Black Journalists Code - sorta like the Da Vinci Code, but involving press passes and Afros.
The shame of this is I just learned the new secret handshake, which involves two more fist pumps than the last secret handshake, a flick of the thumb, and two finger snaps. And we'll all have to change the password again. Seriously, I nearly panicked this morning when I tried to log into our secret pro-Obama computer system and the voice recognition monitor rejected my whisper of "Jello pudding pops!" Note to self, next password should not be a Bill Cosby-endorsed food-like product. Too easy to figure out.
And what about the Black Journalists
Hall of Justice Legion of Doom Borg Hive? I for one don't want to relocate. I like meeting in a deluxe apartment in the sky...y...y...y. Damn! Did it again. Now we really have to move.
OK, I'll stop. I can't keep going without cracking myself up. And it's important that I don't waste those laughs, since my wife is certain I'm the only person who thinks I'm funny.
At any rate, I don't care which side of this presidential election you're on. But to suggest that black journalists collectively have gone out of their way to promote Obama is silly. You can make that argument about the media in general, if you want. Some of you will. And, as usual, I'll disagree. But to say that black journalists specifically have committed this ethical sin? Tsk, tsk, Ms. Ferraro.
If anything, the black journalists I've read on this campaign have exercised great caution and balance in their reporting. Editorial writers and TV pundits...of all colors, on the other hand? Well, that's a different ball game. They're paid to give their opinion on who should win or lose and why. But Ms. Ferraro has been around long enough to know that at least in the case of newspapers, the newsrooms and the editorial boards operate independent of one another. And the cable TV news pundits who regularly opine that Obama is likely to score the Democratic nomination? Well, last I checked none of the regulars were black, except on CNN.
Geraldine Ferraro may not have taught me anything new about how the media operates, but she helped me make my point about the similarities between old-school Democrats and old-school Republicans: the GOP does not hold exclusive rights to archaic thinking about black people's ability to operate within "the" system.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some dirt to brush off my shoulders...that's right. Both of 'em.