What's crackin' folks? Next week we're gonna resume "Ask James Anything Friday," a post we haven't done for a while. So start getting your questions together, and tell your friends, neighbors, relatives, and fellow bloggers to think of stuff too. 'Cause if I don't get at least 100 questions next Friday, I'm going on blog strike.
In the mean time I figured I'd take a quick look at the headlines and what's crackin' in the burgs across the
corny fruited plains.
- Read the first paragraph and tell me where was this town, when I could never find a quarter for the parking meter? Seriously, between fines and having to use dollar bills, I've spent a mortage's worth of coin on parking in "big city" America.
- This story about the lost parrot who was able to tell folks at a vet clinic where he lived was cool, but what I'm curious about is why the bird absolutely refused to talk to police. Seriously, he bit his tongue when cops tried to get him to open up. Clearly this bird has been negatively influenced by the Stop Snitching lobby.
- Why can't a thumbs-up just be a simple thumbs-up? Too much detail here. I think from now on I'm just gonna give the power fist when I want to act out hello, instead of just saying it.
- Have you heard the one about the guy who found a fly in his water bottle? No, I'm not trying to remake the fly-in-the-soup joke. A Canadian man found a fly in his unopened drinking water bottle and sued the company 'cause of the distress it caused him. He says he's such a neat, clean person that the idea of a dirty beast like a fly in his drinking water freaked him out so badly that his business and his sex life were negatively impacted. Damn! He was initially awarded a judgment of about $345,000, or about $12.15 in American money. Kidding, kidding! I know the Canadian dollar is worth more than the U.S. dollar. Anyway, the Supreme Court of Canada just tossed out the judgment 'cause it said this guy's reaction to the fly-in-the-water was so over-the-top it couldn't have been anticipated and the water bottling company shouldn't be held responsible for his irrational fear of flies. What do you think?
- Finally, a bit of commentary: I was watching The First 48 last night, the A&E Network documentary show that follows homicide detectives around. And the two featured cases were murders of young men in Memphis and Tuscon. The victim in Tuscon was a 16-year-old who was fatally shot in the chest while walking home from the movies with a buddy. According to the buddy, two other young men approached them. One of the other young men brandished a revolver and demanded the victims empty their pockets. A moment later a single shot was fired. The 16-year-old, a popular high school jock was dead. Detectives caught up with the 18-year-old shooter with relative ease, about a day later. The first thing he told them "I didn't mean to shoot anybody." Next he told them he just wanted to scare the victims. Then he said the victim grabbed for the gun, apparently thinking it was a toy, and it just "went off." Finally, the shooter told the cops he's not that type of guy. If you're a parent or guardian or friend or sibling of a young man who likes to play pretend gangster, here's a piece of advice: tell him if he just wants to scare people he should walk up behind them and yell "boo!" 'Cause when you point a gun at someone in the commission of a crime, it sorta says you're at least willing to shoot them. And if you can't pronounce "boo!" and feel you really need to point a gun in order to induce fear, then leave the bullets out of it. But don't say you didn't mean to shoot. Shooting someone during a robbery isn't an accident. I don't care if the "evil" gun maker sold someone a hair trigger firearm and they sold it to you. When I look between my seat to get that french fry I dropped and don't see the car in front of me slam on its brakes? That's an accident. Carrying a loaded gun that just "went off?" No accident.
That's all for me today, folks. Enjoy your weekend. And take a minute or more to think about a sailor, marine, soldier, airman, or Coast Guardy person (what are they called?). Whether you disapprove or approve of our current armed conflicts, you can't be mad at the Average Joes who've given their lives in service of country.