So the topic on my weekly TV thingie this morning was a recent Divorce Magazine survey that revealed just 46% of men and a whopping 72% of women believe a cyber-affair constitutes cheating on one's significant other.
Keeping in mind that cyber-affairs are essentially Web versions of phone sex - romantic and/or dirty talk - with the added "bonus" of Web cams and so on, I have to confess I was surprised the men and women surveyed felt so differently about this.
I ain't delusional. I realize that to some guys a look is a look is a look, and a chat is a chat is a chat, and none of that necessarily crosses a line unless there's physical contact. Of course, the guys who usually believe that are guys who probably don't have really significant others anyway.
Guys who do have real wives or girlfriends or whatever, If you can work that deal out with them, I may think you're a freak, but more power to you. But you're never going to get around the fact that more women believe this is cheating because it requires an emotional bond. And it may even require a stronger emotional bond than an in person relationship, because you don't have physical contact....at least initially.
The survey also revealed this interesting tidbit about contact: Apparently, over the past 10 years the number of divorces caused by "Web-induced" cheating has skyrocketed to one-third of all divorces filed for in the U.S.
And how did they get to that point? Apparently, 30 % of people who have cyber-affairs, eventually have at phone conversations with their cheating partner, and those phone conversations have led to in-person meetings.
And 31% of cyber-cheaters admit that they have eventually met their Web partner and engaged in real sex.
So the bottom line is this, fellas...and ladies too, but to a lesser degree: As with phone sex with strangers, unless you and your partner have some kind of freaky arrangement (that you really shouldn't tell anyone about) save all your racy talk for her or him.
'Cause it's pretty clear that conversation and a keyboard can get you into all sorts of trouble.