I'm off today, belatedly celebrating my birthday. And today is a good day.
I woke up to sunshine, birds singing, no poison toads in my Koi pond, no neighbors' dog poop on my swale, and no crackheads hitting me up for coin-for-"food" outside the neighborhood Starbucks.
And like Ice Cube, I'd swear I caught a glimpse of the Goodyear Blimp, though I'm not sure if it read "James is a pimp."
But none of that is the big announcement.
The big announcement is that I'm launching a new career. No worries, I'm not quitting journalism. But I am now also a savings and loan institution.
My plan is to get loaded from my new part-time gig before the next US president is sworn in.
So if you need a loan, and you are fairly certain you won't be able to pay it back, I'm your guy.
The way I see it I will have loaned out all my dough by Thanksgiving, and I will have loaned most of it to people whose eyes are bigger than their wallets.
And when I'm all tapped out, I'll just ask the White House and Congress to bail me out...for a sum greater than what the First Bank of James is even worth.
Then I'll be able to retire relatively young from the news biz.
So that's my plan. I'm taking credit card applications for the next 30 days. All you need is a Coke and a smile, but no measurable source of income.
Why not? It works.
Sent via Blackberry from AT&T