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Screen Gems: TV the week of September 28

Friday Night Lights (9 p.m. Wednesday, DirecTV) -- You pathetic Luddite fools still clinging to 20th Fridaynightlights century technology have to wait until February, when West Texas' sexiest, if not necessarily most skilled, high-school football team returns to NBC. But if you've got DirecTV's satellite service, you can see Friday Night Lights' new third season debut on channel 101. Dillon High has a new principal, a new quarterback and a whole new set of illicit romances to stew over.

Gabriel (9 p.m. Sunday, SBS) -- This sexy, scary new series about vampires might mark the beginning of the ned for Spanish-language telenovelas. Written and shot like a regular television series, Gabriel is the best thing on Spanish TV since...well, ever.

Dexter (9 p.m. Sunday, Showtime) -- In a vicious libel of South Florida that I, for one, will never forgive, the new season of Dexter that kicks off Sunday portrays a Miami that's running short on serial killers! So our murderous cop hero might have to use his power tools on, like, regular people. If you've got nominees, send me the names, and I'll forward them to Showtime.

Californication (10 p.m. Sunday, Showtime) -- Speaking of slicing and dicing, David Duchovny's horndog novelist Hank Moody is about to give in to the demands of his wife and get a vasectomy as the second season of Californication opens. Oh, and they're planning to move to Manhattan, so I guess the show will be renamed Newyorfornication. Otherwise, all's well on the dirtiest sitcom in the history of

Little Britain USA (10:30 p.m. Sunday, HBO) -- Check back later today for a full review of this comic-sketch show swiped from the BBC.

The Life & Times Of Tim (11 p.m. Sunday, HBO) -- Check back later today for a full review of this new adult cartoon.

The Ex List (9 p.m. Friday, CBS) -- In this new CBS series that's not exactly a comedy and not exactly a drama and not exactly good, Elizabeth Reaser (Grey's Anatomy) plays a florist who's told by a gypsy that if she doesn't marry one of her ex-boyfriends by the end of the year, she'll die alone and heartbroken. And, we can all pray, soon.


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