It's easy to hammer Bravo's new pseudo-reality show Miami Social -- just watch me -- but it really does represent a singular achievement. Sifting through all the imbecilic, self-obsessed trash littering Ocean Drive to come up with the seven most pathetically vacuous, narcissistic excuses for human beings on all of South Beach was truly a Herculean task. Specifically, I'm thinking of when he had to clean the Augean stables of an eternity's worth of animal dung. (Miami Social cast, get your mommies to read you the story -- that is, if any of you actually were born and not hatched.) The show's casting director should be given some kind of award, then parachuted onto a lost desert island where he can never threaten us again.
Before we go any further, let's be clear about something: I'm not saying Miami Social is so bad it's good. I'm saying it's so bad it will make you regret being born with eyes. Read my full review of the worst show since the invention of TV -- possibly since the invention of entertainment -- in Tuesday's Miami Herald.