Every night I wake from the dream screaming, doctor, and you've got to help me. It's always the same: Jennifer Aniston is curled up on a couch across the room, wearing a slithery cobalt-blue peignoir, and as I approach her my brain is tingling with desire streaked with confusion about the fact that I even know what a peignoir is, much less how to spell it, and then I'm at the couch, on my knees, my moist hands reaching out for . . . a pizza on the coffee table. And that's when I wake up, bathed in clammy sweat, shrieking, WHERE'S THE PEPPERONI?
I would never have guessed it, but the Miami Herald Fitness Challenge is breaking down my brain before it does my body. And I'm not the only one. With less than two weeks to go before the final weigh-in, my partners in pudge Andrew Richardson and Lisett Araujo are as deranged by fantasies as I am. Well, give or take a Jennifer Aniston.
``Pasta, pasta, pasta,'' says Lisett. ``After the last weigh-in, I'm going out to dinner somewhere that I can get a pasta dish. A big pasta dish. I really miss pasta. Then I'll follow it with a chocolate dessert. A big chocolate dessert." Read the rest of my story on the final countdown of the Miami Herald Fitness Challenge.