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'School Pride' goeth before we get ill, hopefully

Any fleeting thought I had that School Pride might be less phony than the average TV reality show Schoolpride vanished literally seconds into the first episode, when one of the hosts, Jacob Soboroff, was identified as a ``political journalist.'' Which, in reality-speak, means he reports on film festivals for the AMC movie channel. Hey, did I mention that I'm an astronaut, a former American League homerun champion and the guy Al Gore stole the Internet from? In reality-speak, anyway.

From there, School Pride tries to sell more whoppers than Burger King. This school-makeover show has all the phony trappings of reality TV: ``Secret'' meetings at which none of the furtive participants seems to notice an NBC camera crew lurking around the room. Squeal-on-cue shots of happy recipients of swag shrieking and dancing around like voracious badgers were trapped in their pants. Hosts breaking down in self-congratulatory tears as they recount their superhuman efforts on behalf of the unwashed masses. Watching it was so tedious that I seriouly wondered why I gave up inventing penicillin and winning NASCAR races to become a TV critic. Read my full revew in Thursday's Miami Herald.

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