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A little too much egg nog for Santa

Drunksanta Can't make this up:

North Pole man clipped for DUI on riding mower

Seems that a 20-year-old Alaska man led State Troopers on a low-speed chase that covered several lawns.

When they finally pulled him over -- after about 200 feet with speeds topping out at 5 mph -- he reportedly blew a 0.18.

This story raises oh, so many questions.

Like A: Does grass actually grow in North Pole?

The answer is a surprising yes. Wednesday's high temperature is expected to reach 71 degrees.

How about B: Is this where Rudolph and the elves live?

No. The real North Pole -- which, incidentally, is in the middle of the Arctic Ocean -- is thousands of miles to the northeast of the Alaska town.

And C: How far away is North Pole, Alaska?

Far. Really far. Like 4,938 miles from the Herald's Miami office far.

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