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Woman sues after yeehaw ouchie

Mechanicalbull It might be time to test the safety of the mechanical bull at Johnny Utah's in New York's Rockefeller Center.

For the second time in as many months, a customer has filed a lawsuit against the restaurant, alleging injuries suffered from said bull.

In the latest suit, a Queens woman claims "assault and battery" after the restaurant's employees let her ride the bull when she was drunk. She also says workers kept increasing the bull's bucking speed, trying to toss her off.

Posted by Evan Benn at 03:20 PM on October 29, 2008 in Crime , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

'Just don't cut it off'

A (kinky) 73-year-old New York man had to have a piece of steel pipe surgically removed from his penis after an erotic session went awry.

The man's penis swelled up and turned purple, forcing him to the hospital, and forcing the perplexed hospital staff to call in reinforcements, according to the Times Herald-Record. They came in the form of firefighters armed with something called a pneumatic saw, alternately called "the wizzer" (seriously, it's in the article).

It took more than 90 minutes to chip away at the inch-long, quarter-inch-thick piece of steel. The man remained calmly nervous as the wizzer closed in on him, reportedly telling the firefighter, "Just don't cut it off."

No details from authorities on how the pipe got stuck, but they confirmed it happened during some sort of sexual encounter. 

*Thanks to Larry for the -- pun alert -- tip.

Posted by Evan Benn at 11:05 AM on October 28, 2008 in Police , Sexual Assault , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Maritime lawyers tackle Wilma claim

Legacy3_2 A federal lawsuit filed in Key West District Court this week alleges an insurance company failed to make good on its policy for a 158-foot luxury yacht grounded by Hurricane Wilma in October 2005.

The photo shows the Legacy aground at the Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary, where the plaintiffs say it remained for more than two years, stuck in sand and sea grass.

The lawsuit, first reported by Courthouse News Service, was filed by Legacy owner Peter Halmos against Pennsylvania-based Insurance Company of North America.

Halmos and friends were in the Gulf of Mexico near the Keys when Wilma closed in on them on Oct. 24, 2005. They decided to hunker down and ride out the storm, which knocked them aground.

Halmos and his crew claimed they were spending more than $1 million a month to try to free the Legacy and prevent any environmental damage, according to this yachting blog. Now they want the insurance company to reimburse some of those damage costs.   

Posted by Evan Benn at 11:31 AM on October 24, 2008 in Crime , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Beauty queen busted after bailing on bill (UPDATED)

0_61_102108_lindseyevans Miss Teen Louisiana Lindsey Evans managed a smile in her mugshot this weekend (top left), despite getting busted in what has to be one of the dumbest crimes in recent memory:

Evans, 18, and some friends skipped out on a $46 tab at a Bossier City, La., restaurant over the weekend, Fox reports. Apparently, beauty queens don't get a stipend for food.

Here's where the intelligence really breaks down: 1. Smartypants Evans left her purse at the restaurant. 2. She had weed in her purse. 3. She went back to the restaurant to retrieve the purse. Cops were waiting for her and her buddies.

081022evans2hmed730awidec Her reign ends in November. Pageant officials haven't said whether they will strip Evans of her crown because of her arrest.

*UPDATE: Evans has been de-crowned, 10 days shy of completing her duties.

"Lindsey Evans has been part of an organization that believes in opportunities when earned and consequences when warranted," Paula Miles, president of pageant sponsor RPM, said. "Due to recent circumstances, Lindsey has been relieved of her duties as Miss Louisiana Teen USA 2008 effective immediately."

Posted by Evan Benn at 11:09 AM on October 22, 2008 in Crime , Police , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

A delicious traffic accident

Meltedicecreamshop_2 Did somebody say block party?

A tractor-trailer overturned on a highway in Tacoma, Wash., Monday, spilling almost 23 tons of chocolate, ice cream, hot dogs and deli meat.

Workers shoveled the 45,000 pounds of food into dump trucks to be discarded. What a shame.

(The photo at left is not from the scene, but it's the best I could find of melted ice cream on a road.)

We jest only because no major injuries were reported -- just some gnarly traffic tie-ups as workers cleared the sticky scene.

*Thanks to our friends at the South Florida MenuPages blog for the tip.

Posted by Evan Benn at 01:48 PM on October 21, 2008 in Weird News | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Police want YOU...in uniform

Help20wanted From Most Wanted to Help Wanted:

They say a down economy leads to more crime. Perhaps that's why the Hollywood Police Department is looking to beef up its officer ranks.

During a recent spin down Hollywood Boulevard, a colleague of ours passed a flashing police sign -- you know, the ones that usually remind you to slow down or buckle up -- advertising openings in the department.

The HPD salary range is $42,000-$66,000 for officers, plus an array of benefits. Interested? Call 954-967-4372.

Posted by Evan Benn at 12:02 PM on October 21, 2008 in Broward County , Hollywood Crime , Police | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Shoplifter stuffs pants with frozen shrimp

Seafood_mix No doubt, times are tough.

We've told you about drug dealers upping the price of their wares to make up for rising gas costs.

We've told you about a shoplifter who basically tried to put an entire Kmart down her pants.

And now: A Bradenton man busted after stuffing bags of frozen shrimp in his pantaloons. An undercover detective tackled Joseph Young, 32, when he tried to dart out of the supermarket with the crustaceans. Young's being held on $2,600 bond.

Posted by Evan Benn at 11:47 AM on October 20, 2008 in Crime , Police , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Dead worker found in restaurant

11342137p1 An employee of Lucca's restaurant in Chicago was found dead in the Italian eatery's basement. His hands were tied, police said.

Few details were reported in this Chicago Tribune article, which says the man has not been identified and no arrests have been made. It was also unclear how he died, but police said the victim suffered trauma.

Final thought: A neighbor told the Trib he thought Lucca's kitchen was in the basement, where the body was found.

Posted by Evan Benn at 05:06 PM on October 16, 2008 in Crime , Homicide , Police , Weird News | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

It’s official: Jury duty is not fun

Angry I managed to get through the first 29 years and change of my life without receiving a summons for jury duty.

Most likely, it’s because I haven’t had the same address for more than two years at any point in my life since 1997.

Or perhaps it’s because I’m too smart for the jury pool.

Now look, I’m not a braggart. There are people at the Herald who run intellectual circles around me. (However, I run equally impressive circles around them when it comes to imbibing. Everyone has a gift.)

But you really don’t get a true appreciation for the population's wide range in intellect until you’re forced to spend a day with them, debating the virtues of the Fifth Amendment and the necessity of self-defense.

But that’s exactly where I found myself Wednesday, on a Miami-Dade jury panel for a first-degree murder trial.

The man on trial has been accused of stabbing to death a former love interest. Maybe he did it. Maybe not.

But I'll never know for sure. I was one of 40 perspectives, of which 12 jurors and two alternates were picked.

I was not one of the 14 – probably because of my profession.

But judging from some of those that were picked, I pray for our legal system.

Many thought that pleading the Fifth was a defacto admission of guilt. Others swore there was no scenario under which a man could use self-defense against a woman. One even pretended she didn't speak English in an attempt to get off the panel -- a ruse the judge quickly spotted.

It took me 10 hours to remember what I had forgotten years ago: There are a lot of, how should I say this, narrowly thinking people out there.

But I didn’t need a daylong civics lesson for that. All I needed to do was watch how our presidential nominees are picked.

Here endeth the lesson. Rant over.

Posted by Adam Beasley at 04:38 PM on October 16, 2008 in Dade County | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Family cremates mom in backyard, cashes retirement checks

Back in January, it was the story of two New York men taking a cue from "Weekend at Bernie's," rolling a dead friend to a store to cash his social security check.

Tony_ray_3 Now, from California, comes the story of a woman and her son who cremated a family member using a backyard fire pit and then continued to cash her retirement checks.

Officials say Ramona Allmond, 84, probably died a natural death in December.

What followed was not.

Kathleen_2 After her death, her daughter, Kathleen Allmond, 50, and grandson, Tony Ray, 30, left her on the floor for a week and then cremated her in the backyard pit, the Associated Press reports. They put soil over top and then planted a tree.

(At left, a picture of Kathleen Allmond allegedly wearing a necklace made with a two-inch piece of her mother's skull. She also wore a beaded tiara to ward off radio waves, the story says.)

Said Sheriff's Capt. Paul Hosler: "It gets really weird when you have a piece of mom's skull hanging around your neck. I'm not aware of any religion that allows you to burn your family members in the backyard and collect their pension.''

The two apparently cashed more than $25,000 worth of her retirement checks. The charges include suspicion of embezzlement, elder abuse and disposing of a body without a permit, AP reports.

A sheriff's detective told the AP her wish may have been to die at home and be cremated.

Perhaps she should have been more specific.

Posted by Jennifer Lebovich at 10:58 PM on October 15, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

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