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T.O.? Don't even think about it

Reasons the Miami Dolphins will not sign Terrell Owens following confirmation through the league news wire Thursday that the enigmatic wide receiver's contract in Dallas has been terminated:

Because Bill Parcells didn't want him in Dallas in 2006 when Owens was four years younger and had helped ruin the locker room harmony of two, rather than three clubs as it now stands.

Because T.O. is 35 years old.

Because T.O. will want a big fat contract.

Because some fool franchise will probably give it to him.

Because T.O. is selfish rather than selfless.

Because Parcells likes selfless rather than selfish.

Because there is no bellman the Dolphins can hire strong enough to carry all of T.O.'s baggage.

Because the Dolphins are going to draft their No. 1 receiver in the coming draft.

Because the Dolphins have seen veteran receivers Marvin Harrison, T.J. Houshmandzadeh, and Laveranues Coles come on the market this year and barely blinked at the idea of having interest.

Because T.O. is another veteran receiver on the market.

Because T.O. had run-ins with Jeff Garcia.

And Donovan McNabb.

And Jason Witten.

And coaches on the Philadelphia staff.

And Parcells protoge' Todd Haley.

Because T.O. had drama with Tony Romo.

And his female P.R. assistant.

And some pills.

And Parcells hates drama.

But the biggest reason the Dolphins will not sign Terrell Owens despite a glaring need and desire to upgrade the receiver corps? Because they are not stupid.

[BLOG NOTE: Check out the offering below on De'Cody Fagg's workout with the Dolphins earlier this week.]