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Burress not getting his wish with Dolphins

Before he wrote his buzz column that included this interesting tidbit about Plaxico Burress wanting to join the Dolphins, colleague Barry Jackson called and asked if I knew whether the Dolphins would consider adding Burress as a way of improving their receiver corps.

I told Barry I had no idea because I haven't asked. Well, now I've asked and Burress, a South Florida resident, has two chances of playing for the 2009 Dolphins.

You guessed it: Slim. And none.

The Dolphins are not now and probably will not be interested later in Burress even if he clears the marathon course of legal hurdles he must navigate before getting back in the game. Yes, Burress is a supremely talented receiver who has had a productive career since being drafted eighth overall by the Steelers in 2000.

But come on, does one have to spell out the problems with Burress coming to Miami? There was a long pause and a, "Is this the reason you're calling me," response from one source when I asked about this possibility Tuesday.

Here are the positives and negatives on the issue as the Dolphins see it:

The positives: There are no positives.

The negatives:  Let's start with the easy stuff. Burress is going to be 32 years old in August and exempting everything else, he is in decline. His yards per reception average has dropped since hitting a career high of 19.9 in 2004. It was 16.0 in 2005, 15.7 in 2006, 14.6 in 2007, and 13.0 in 2008. And that's the least of his problems.

He has proven to be injury-prone the past couple of years and rarely, if ever, practiced during the 2007 season even as the Giants were rushing headlong toward a Super Bowl title. As you know, practice is kinda sorta important to Tony Sparano -- just behind breathing.

Then there are the sideshow issues that Burress tows in his wake. The biggest problem he faces is the looming legal issue stemming from his accidental shooting on November 28, 2008. Burress, in his infinite wisdom, carried a Glock pistol in the waistband of his sweatpants into the LQ nightclub in New Yawk. The gun began sliding down his leg and, as he apparently fumbled for it, Burress shot himself in the leg F-Troop style.

(Give me a second to stop laughing after typing that last sentence.) 

Aside from the pain and embarrassment the shooting might have caused Burress, the bigger problem is the ensuing charge of unlawful carrying of a handgun authorities slapped on Burress. The charge carries a 3 1/2 year sentence if Burress is convicted. Burress has pleaded not guilty to the charges but as Mike Florio astutely notes in today's rumor mill at profootballtalk.com, the issue is not just going to poof, disappear, before the start of the 2009 season. And so even if Burress eventually gets off, his chances of contributing to a new team at the start of the season seem remote.

Oh, and there are a myriad other reasons Burress is not on Miami's radar.

Even if you dismiss the shooting because, hey, stuff like that doesn't bother you, there is the March 1, 2009 traffic stop in which Burress was ticketed four times for various things and must still resolve in Broward County court. There is the domestic violence calls in August and September of 2008 that resulted in temporary restraining orders against Burress that were later dismissed by the state.

And then there are the football problems.

Remember that Burress played for Tom Coughlin, a Bill Parcells disciple and friend. Parcells can pick up the phone and ask Coughlin about Burress and get unambiguous answers. And some of those answers would likely come after questions about Burress being chronically late to team meetings, Burress refusing to practice because of an ankle injury the team didn't believe he had, Burress pouting about his contract, and Burress being suspended by the team on Oct 5, 2008 for violating an unspecified team rule.

The Steelers also suspended Burress in 2004 for for failing to show up for a practice. Burress has been fined by the Steelers, Giants and the NFL at various times during his career and estimates on those cumulative fines range from $50,000 to over $200,000.

So the picture is bleak for Burress if he continues to hold out hope for a chance with the Dolphins.

Because it is not happening.

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he'd be a great mentor for Ted Ginn and Pat white

haha. ya I was laughing when I saw that report. he's the poster child for everything Bill P and Tony S DON'T want on the team. T.O. would have been a better option...not a good one...but a better one.

Yeah, he'd be a great example for the younger receivers by showing them how to miss practice, cause trouble, get injured, demand a new contract and go to clubs where you can get in carrying a gun and wearing sweatpants.

He'd be great. Sign him immediately.

NOT!

Was Barry Jackson on crack? Does the Herald test for drugs? And how long before Cote writes another stupid article demanding the Dolphins sign Plaxico?

C: yeah, he'd be a good mentor...but he wouldn't mentor them if he got on the team...

Good stuff.

Why would he love to play in Miami? Simple, lots of clubs, lots of guns, lots of women. Go somewhere else to go into semi retirment, Plexiglass!

Mando, the more often I come bag to your blog for discussion on this great franchise, the less I see comments based on football, and more homophobic nonsense. Too bad.

Actually Mark, I'm deleting all the ridiculous stuff.

Paul, stop it!

Even though it wont happen,is'nt it great that all these great players all of a sudden want to play for the Dolphins? Just proves what a great job Sparano,Parcells and Ireland are doing....

Thanks, Mando!

Mando. check the end of previous blog of statements made by the menace, menace impersonating roy or roy himself. Why no remarks or deletions ? These were responses to them. i know 2 wrongs don't make a right , but this is to much.

I'll look for them and delete them, too.


Agree 100% Man-dob-olus! Plaxico is a troubled young man that the Trifecta will not bring here. Its not so much making a mistake or two, its a history of bad decisions and the pseudo thug/gangsta lifestyle. Its a shame because this guy has all the talent in the world.

The rebuilding continues. In Tuna we trust.

Jerry Jones should sign him cause he will improve the Boys image, since he has never been charged with sniffing cocaine.

I don't know if this team is truly in rebuilding mode.... I mean, maybe it's just me but when I think of a rebuilding team, I think of a team that is hoping to win 5 or 6 games. I think this team's a player, you can't say that they really have a weakness. Solid line, able receivers, very good backs, solid defense, smart quarterback. I think anything less than 10 wins is underachieving.

Not going after Burress is not a sign of a team that's rebuilding, it's just a smart football decision. I think any team going after him is a sign of desperation. The guys here can do the job.

I think Randy Starks needs Plexiglass here so he can Ride Shotgun. Randys problem was he didnt have anyone riding Shotgun

We loves the big uglies. But we hates the English language and propa grammar. Deuces. Or is that douches?

Haha, didn't Randy have 12 people in his truck including one riding his, uh hum, console? Sounds like he had half a dozen people already riding shotgun.

the raiders,cowboys,or the bengals will sign him.

Wow, those numbers you put out are pretty convincing Armando. I grant you they are still better than anything Ted Ginn has been able to do, but when you combine bad dude with bad football player, you don't have a Dolphins player in the midst. You have a Cincy Bengal.

Mark. You came on this blog crying about non-football and non-sense posts . but yet you're doing the damn thing. Do we really have to hear about Uh Hum , riding consoles ?

I have seen posters on here saying the Dolphins should sign Plex or whatever his name is. Where are they now?

Marck and miadolph 1 ,both of you claim to be fin fans and yet you attack starks like he made a big mistake when it's no thing, i like to know if you been to jail, now don't over react but think how bad it's to attack a person in the sake of cheap joke.

Dear Mr. Salguero

" Burress shot himself in the leg F-Troop style"

F Troop Cast

Ken Berry headed the cast as the bumbling Captain Wilton Parmenter.

Forrest Tucker as Sergeant Morgan O'Rourke

Larry Storch as Corporal Randolph Agarn

Melody Patterson as Wrangler Jane Angelica Thrift, owner of the general store and Captain Parmenter's girlfriend.

Which one is Paxico ?


Soiled :)

Receiver - I still remember him single-handedly beating the Gators with something like 15 receptions. He was a beast. What an absolutely great NFL talent.

Human Being - he has no clue what life is all about. He's a self-made man, clearly in love with his maker. He has no respect for anyone or anything, including himself. If he couldn't catch footballs, he'd be in prison or dead today. He just might wind up in prison despite being able to catch footballs, and to be honest, that's probably where he belongs. A complete sociopath.

Dear Mr. Salguero

I ment to say which one is Plaxico.

Sorry about the spelling,I was never any good at math.

Soiled :)

soiled, i was just eating lunch and you came up with your ugly name,didn't we agree to have five minutes notice before you show up like that ,i can't eat any more.how in the life me ,you came up with this ugly name ? make it short.


my dinner at....6;45-7-30

Mr salguero . Where is the deletions i mentioned including the post at 1:40 by roy impersonating mr bunglito.

Dear Mr. Sammy

I am sorry that your meal times and my Medication times are on the same shedule.

I like Jason Taylor (FootBall Talk)


Soiled :)

Gopats, I have no problem with Randy Starks or what happened. Sounds like a minor traffic offense to me (if he didn't attack the officer with the car that is). I was just making a joke about Randy having a girl riding his "console".

And no, I haven't been to jail.

And yes, Plax is/was an amazing talent. He was a freak at Mich St, and I will always appreciate him being part of the team that beat the Pats in the Super Bowl.

And, "we the people", grow up. Big difference between making veiled comments and graphically describing someone getting sodomized on this blog. And my comment did involve football at least, yours didn't at all.

Since it seems he'll be going into prison a "wide reciever" theres very little chance he'll be comins out as a "split end"

Burress is a bad, bad, bad, guy. He has pro bowl talent, but he is such a bad guy that his talent is irrelevant. Sparano said that he has been patient with Soliai b/c he has a good heart. Well, Burress hasnt only done a laundry list of bad things, but I think he is actually a bad guy at his core. His essence is a selfish, arrogant, mean person. I wouldnt let him go to an OTA with the Dolphins, much less actually sign with the team.

gopats???? where do you want them to go??? If its to last place in the league im all for that too.
i think u need to lighten up, lifes too short.it wasnt an attack on Randy and it wasnt a Cheap joke ( it cost me 10 dollars )but i gave it to u for free laugh & smile
it shouldnt be so hard since you already have a sense of humor by backing the pats

Mark. You need to grow up. this blog was about P. burress . your comment about riding uh um consoles and riding shot gun , which we know what you meant , also involves sodomy and had nothing to do with football and this blog. It's a 2 way street.

The Jets are so desperate that they want to sign Plax. Their top receivers are Cotcherry, Clowney, Stuckey. Thats one of the worse WR corps in the league, thats why they want Plax. They are really desperate.

To my felloow bloggers

It doesnt matter how great the talent is if there is no moral compass.(Life and Football talk)


Soiled :)

miadolph1....in this dolphin blog when you make a negative comment about starks,the low IQ fin fans they will jump your wagon and start targeting him with more negative posts and before you know it , he wil become a joke line for a week .

mark.....peace

Guys (universal term in case AO is monitoring) I don't care if you disagree or even hate each other. That's your deal. But you MUST sign as yourselves and NOT the person you're trying to hate on/embarrass because I can tell the difference and I will delete your imposter post.

Capiche?

Dear Mr. Salguero

You sir are a reasonable Facsimil of the Man.

Soiled :)

I've been reading this blog for some time and Mando you make references to sources you call. I have to say I cannot remember them being wrong so obviously they are pretty high up. I'm wondering how you get sources when the Dolphins are known as a tight organization for media sources? I understand how Mort or Clayton do it because they're national.

But I'm impressed you do it to and you're local. You need to go to NFL Network or something.

Mark you forgot one thing in your list.
GREAT coaching. It was game planning and coaching that won half of those games last year.
these guys played to the strength & weaknesses of our opponents and it showed when u paid attention to it.
notice how it seemed like every week there was a different star or go to guy.
Camarillo would have a big game, so the next opponent would game plan for him and Ginn would be the big guy. And it changed week to week. Opposing defenses couldnt game plan against 1 or 2 guys without getting burned by a different guy.
each of these players, our coaches find thier best attributes , then give them a specific group of plays to work on making them experts on those plays.
watch close this year and youll see what i mean. each of these guys has a special group of plays , that done over and over they get extremely good at.

Dear Mr. Salguero

"Capiche?"

Thats Italian right ?

Then shouldn't this line be, I can tell the difference and I will Wack your imposter post


Just wondering

Soiled :)

soiled, to improve your jokes ,

1-no jokes like last one, any mafia jokes don't work any more ,we saw the god father million times and soprano a million times,so no more jokes left.

2-spare us w/ all that space you take on the page,make it short please,i feel you are becoming the new nathaniel on this blog

Just say no to Plaxico... He is old, self-centered, and not very bright... maybe he could put out an Album with Ron Artest or something...

Armando,

Thanks for finally getting this blog under control, it had gotten ridiculous in the last week or so...

Dear Mr. Sammy

"spare us w/ all that space you take on the page,make it short please

I

Will

Do

My

Best.

"you are becoming the new nathaniel on this blog"

Thank You :)

I Find Mr. Dodsworth to be a very witty blogger


Soiled :)

Soulja. LOL. what are you talking about ? you were also involved , a little , is some of the ridiculous posts.

Soulja. What are you talking about ? You were involved in some of the ridiculous posts. LOL Don't play all mr innocent.

only in response to you knuckle heads... believe it or not I come here to get info on and talk about the Miami Dolphins and when people make it impossible to do that, I get aggravated...

Dear Mr. Souljahbeats

"only in response to you knuckle heads"

Although we have never spoke I will admitt I am one of the "Knuckleheads"

Most of my posts are pure nonsense.

But in defense I truely do come here for my Dolphin info. :)

There are some really passionate Football fans here that have great takes on what the Phins are doing or should be doing.


Anyhoo Hello Souljah :)


Soiled :)

Burress is a side show. He belongs on the Bills, Jets or Raiders. The dolphins don't require players on the decline. Especially ones with a truckload of baggage and an attitude.

I appreciate that you are deleting/blocking moronic posters that are posing as others or are posting stuff that belongs on MSN. I like a good joke now and then and rants are cool but when someone just comes on here to constantly be an idiot, then there must a facebook friend they could stalk (oops snuggle up to). Your deletion will force them to visit the J-E-T-S blogs.

so if the knuckle heads told you to jump of a bridge , i guess you would jump . LOL

the jets will be a great team this year with rex ryan at helm

soulj, how can any thing bother you ,when you work in hip hop and the yellow big bird music.

What DDD would ever consider bringing a virus like that to any team.......Oh did I mention START HENNE THIS YEAR!

Why would he love to play in Miami? Simple, lots of clubs, lots of guns, lots of women. Go somewhere else to go into semi retirment, Plexiglass!

Posted by: Mark in Toronto
----------------------------------------
The guy who wrote this is complaining about meaningless posts by other people that are unrelated to football?

mrmikejohnson. right on ! and that wasn't the only meaningless , non-football post that mark wrote. Yet , he was the first one crying on this blog about the very same thing .

Any one else hate this Rachel Ray ad for stomach pictures? They don't have 10 dollars to find better looking photos and a clean place to take the shot?

Signing Plaxico would be like the Dolphins shooting themselves in the foot....I mean, leg...no.... FOOT, definitely foot

It's really late over here but I have nothing to do but troll Dolphins blogs. I think signing Burress would be a good idea. It would upgrade the receiver core and give Pennington the big target the Dolphins have wanted for him all along.

Drew Rosenhaus says Burress has three teams interessted in him. What a douche that guy. And what bigger douches the teams interested, if there really are any.

Maybe Rosenhaus is trying not to get fired by another disgruntled WR like he was fired by Boldin.

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