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Not Naughty by Nature: You down with Ohhh and 16?

I told everyone in my column following the Dolphins latest loss that the team was bordering on joke material, that it might not be long before the late night comics latched on to the Dolphins' struggles and use them for giggles.

Well, a local Miami comedian has beaten them to the punch.

Hialeah's own Will Lopez, whose twitter page says he is the lead singer for the group "Guajiro" (if you're not Cuban, nevermind), has put together a little ditty about the Dolphins road the rest of the season. Lopez apparently is set on that road leading to Andrew Luck.

And, of course, the quickest way to get to Luck is to go 0-16. Thus, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, 0-16:

 

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luck and cowher would have us in the playoffs a year later and for years to come. to finally have a shot at a franchise qb (we have had the most starting qbs in nfl since marino left) would be hugeeeeeeeee for this team. if u cant see the importance of getting him than u really shouldnt even be a fan.

dusty, I was worried about this game and the Raiders. But they helped us out by getting Carson Palmer. He'll be fully installed by the time they play us. So they'll win that game. This is the only one!!!

On a good note, Indy plays the Jags twice, and I'm hoping they'll at least split with them.

If,,IF the suck for Luck saga is on in Miami, then I will truly find another team to root for, ie Tampa Buc's who, at least, show up for every game. They dont have diva WR's (the beastie)and they play every down. Watching the defence Monday night, I was sick and threw-up. Mike Nolan better come up with other plans or other players. Koi sucks big time, he actually rests on the shoulder pads of opposing right tackles, saw it.

greg z. EXCELLENT point. Best one of the day.

Never even occured to me because I have always had that little bit of doubt in the back of my mind. "well he did get them to 11-5 his first season". But the truth is Penny was an on field coach and mentor to a lot of guys on that team. They played hard for him. He and Tony were a united front against naysayers. Now Tony is on his own and the stats would validate the Penny theory. Excellent point.

DragonFly, how will you know? Not like they're gonna come out and say it. Or lay down on the field (like Fat Albert). Sparano won't ever say he's losing on purpose. So, again, how will you know?

Oh, and if ANYONE says they won't be a fan if we "Suck for Luck", I PROMISE EVERYONE those people will be riding the bandwagon next year when we get him and are the darlings of the NFL.

So, to those people, you're really not scaring anyone with your threats. Do you!

thats fine dragon fly, see ya next year when your pumped like the rest of us

Matt Moore:

Hit just 47 percent of his passes (16 of 34).

11 of his completions came on throws under 10 yards.

Passes over 10 yards, completed just 5-of-16 for 101 yards and two interceptions.

In seven quarters as the starter this year, Moore has zero touchdowns, three interceptions and a 52.8 rating.

Luck, Russel Wilson, Griffin 3 or QB from Boise. One will be here.

If you look at the NFL as a hollywood story it would stand to reason that Luck would land in Denver, with Elway (Stanford/Can't Miss QB) as his GM.
The Colts picking #2 would take Landry Jones, because Manning will not play again (remember this is hollywood NFL)
The Rams would get the next best player.
The Dolphins, with their hollywood star owners, nightclub in the stadium, owner that shoots himself in the foot and stabs the team in the back, would select Robert Griffin III and have him end up another Andre Ware or Akili Smith.

Personally, I hope they go with Bob Stoops as head coach, we get Landry in the draft, and Stoops brings his 5 WR set to the NFL. We can be the innovators for once (the wildcat may count as innovation, but it was gimmicky) A new offensive system that would stump D coordinators. We can have the offensive version of the "Tampa Two" Defense. Call it the "Miami Wide".


my 2 cents.

There's Some Idiots Here That Think That Winning 2 Or 3 Games Will Make Us More Respectable Around The League , I'm All For Luck If He Really Is The Sure Think Ala Payton Manning , Tell Me What Do You Win With 3 victories And Another Offensive Or Deffensive Lineman Pick , We Need A Franchise QB To Be A Proud Franchise Again

Fire the man already!!!!! Was Armando drunk the other night when he said he "felt bad" for Sparano? WTF?! He felt bad for the guy who gave up on his own team with over a minute to go in the half? Is it any wonder they came out in the second half and sucked? The coach gave up on them so they gave up on him! How is he still employed and how can anyone stick up for a guy who cuts our short distance runner, defends the likes of Colombo, plays for field goals, can't train an o-line even though he's an o-line coach, gives up on his team with over a minute, wtf do I need to go on?! I can site a hundred examples of incompetence and we should feel sorry for him?

I don't buy into this theory that it's not his fault and the players suck. I've said it before and I'll say it again. 90% of the players on this team had played at a high level before coming to Miami. Burnett, Dansby, Marshall,Bush,all were in pro bowls or super bowls. Young guys Davis,Odrick, Gates, Clay, Long, all contributed heavily to good college teams and were standouts.

But all of the sudden they "have no talent"? How does that happen? Usually when a club signs a bunch of great players they move that team to the next level. How is it that in Miami reporters are starting to blame the players and not the coach?

Where in the f**k is Roberto Wallace and Marlon Moore? Played great in the preseason and now can't even get on the field while our #1 WR can't catch a pass in the redzone to save his life and the other guys can't get open! Noooooo don't let them give it a go, they've only been in the league for 3 years, lets keep developing them on the bench. Yeah that's the answer, keep playing Gates, the rookie, because he can stretch the defense? HE CAN'T EVEN GET OPEN!

\tONY SUCKS, tONY SUCKS, Tony sucks. I'm sorry but people are getting sucked into this nice guy/poor me crap and it makes me sick.

I will never root for my team to lose. But some of Us forsaw this. No true competition was brought in for pivotal positions. The players themselves knew of the deficiencies.Watched as the head coach and gm did little about it.Cut Crowder,a captain.
In my opinion,We,Miami Dolphins fans,are witnessing a mutiny.With certain players being caught in the middle!WE will win 2 or 3 games.
Best of Luck to Us next year!

DC don't think we had to worry about the raiders game even without palmer, they play tough and have something to play for. As far as the broncos go, remember tebow has something to prove and the team should rally around that, can't discount that. Could come down to how bad, or not, is broncos secondary?

I have been a Sporano supporter since he was hired, and in many ways I still am.

However. I have seen enough to know that he needs to go. I beleive that his players do like him and havn't quit on him.

Its his lack of holding them accountable that has changed my mind.

I remember the old days when a player screwed up and they would come off the field and would get an ear full of Shula.

These players walk right by Tony and he says nothing! Hell the players were so afraid of Shula that they would walk way around him just to avoid the stare and lecture that came with it.

We need a coach that will hold these players accountable. We have a talented group of players, they are just not motivated. The majority of them show no hustle or sense of urgency.

I'm Tired Of: New England Beating Me Every Year And Making Fun Of My Team Of Rex Ryan Big Mouth And The Jets Of Chicago Coming To My Home Turf And Give My Dolphins A Shoot Out Of Tony Sparano's Time Outs Of My Qb Going To The Line With Out Knowing What Play To Call Of The Field Goals Of my Overrated Defense, Get Me A Qb And A New Direction For This Team Mr:Ross

steve is right. anyone who wants to suck for luck on purpose should be executed.

Yea, I feel sorry for Sparano. For sucking as a HC that earned him an extension and making him a millionaire. Poor Tony. Ok, I'm over it.

Moore & Wallace? With that in mind...

Think back to the season finale against NE last year. Miami was getting nothing on returns all year so Sparano put Marlon Moore in & he ran one back for 40-50 yards.

Every ensuing NE kickoff, Moore wasn't out there. Guess he saw enough in that 40-50 yard run back to know he wasn't good enough.

Hate to say it but, I smell an Eli Manning type scenario if Miami is lucky enough to land the #1 pick.

Why don't somone ask the big tuna what is wrong with his team. The whole mess is his and only his.

Nobody should be surprised if the Dolphins win Sunday. Yes, the team is terrible but in case you've been living in a cave the Broncos are pretty godawful themselves.

Frankly, with the whole 'Suck for Luck' I don't get the apparent anger some have for anyone not in lockstep with that mindset. It's not that I don;t get it (and frankly would LOVE that first pick) but what difference does it make how fans want to react to the season? You have ZERO influence or impact on the actual game results, regardless of how you feel.

Nobody was elected "Voice of the Fans" and should stop acting as such.

If I was Andrew Luck, I'm not sure if I want to go to a team that throws games. I could stay in school for another year. I could sit out like Bo Jackson. I could demand a trade out like Eli Manning. Just saying, the "Suck for Luck" campaign has too many chances of backfiring, and the Dolphins as employers are not making themselves attractive to anyone else on the outside. Employees don't want to go to an organization with a loser's attitude.

I'm not sure why we're still debating whether Sparano should stay or go. He's done!! The only question now is when. I was one of his staunchest supporters but even I can't justify what we're seeing on the field. The team is playing with ZERO fire (although I will concede that Marshall did play hard the other night. He was one of the few). That's all on coaching. Sparano is going to be yet another assistant who has failed, following in the footsteps of Jim Mora Jr, Scott Linehan, Cam Cameron, Wade Phillips, Jim Haslett, Eric Mangini, Josh McDaniels etc....etc..etc...For those that want YET another of the hot assistant coaches out there, this is why we need to have someone with a track record who COMMANDS respect of his players. Jeff Fisher tops that list (I would probably have Cowher as 1A but I'm not convinced he's coming back). For those who have criticized Fisher for his handling of Vince Young, ask yourself where the lineup was for Vince Young when he came available (with all teams knowing on day one of the season he would be available) and ask yourself if he was right or wrong on Young. This guy knows football, he knows football players and he would be the IDEAL head coach for Miami for years to come! You want to see some fire in a team like the Niners are displaying right now, Jeff Fisher is the guy. Successful coach, despite a meddlesome owner and an owner who wouldn't spend when it came to FA. Restore the pride Ross....get the best guy out there!

For those hoping for a "name" coach like Fisher or Cowher (I also favor Fisher, Craig) here's another thing to consider: Start rooting for both the Eagles and Texans to make the playoffs.

Miami will not be the only option for these guys, and if either of those jobs opens up they'll be VERY tempting from an ownership and "win now" perspective. It's not as if these guys are just going to wait for the Dolphins to call or feel any particular bias towards them. Like anyone else, they bwill go where they feel the best opportunity is. Go Eagles and Texans.

U KNOW, 4 R A BILLIONAIRE,ROSS IT'S NOT 2
SMART.IF HE IS ONLY WORRIED ABOUT $, HE'S
GOT TO FIRE T.S. NOW. THE MOMENT FANS NOTICE
SOMETHING POSITIVE HAPPENING, THE SOONER THE
TEAM WILL SELL MORE TICKETS. AS OF RT NOW,THE
RE IS NO HOPE,NO INCENTIVE TO FOLLOW THE TEAM
IF ALL WE GET IS MOORE OF THE SAME.START CORREC
TIVE ACTION NOW. FIRE T.S. & J.I.WITH TIME TO
GET HELP FOR THE NEXT DRAFT. THE LONGER U WAIT
IT WILL ONLY MEAN THAT J.I. WILL BE HERE FOR
THE 2012 DRAFT. SO MORE OF THE SAME? ACT NOW
SCREW ADVISORS, SCREW CONVENTION,SCREW EVERYONE
START A POSITIVE TREND NOW.THE WAY WE R NOW
ANY ONE CAN COACH THE REST OF THE SEASON. AT
THE VERY LEAST OTHER PLAYERS & OTHER POTENTIAL
CANDIDATES WILL BE RESPECTFUL OF THE DOLPHINS.
AT THE VERY LEAST THEY WILL GET THE HINT THAT
WE MEAN CHANGE FOR THE BETTER.

SINCE DYING BREED BIG FIGHT W/HIS LANDLORD AND AFTER HE WAS KICKED OUT OF HIS CONDO AS A RESULT,WE NEVER SEEN HIM AROUND THIS BLOG.HOPE EVERY THING IS FINE FOR HIM .

really joe schmoe? so we get landry jones and another first rounder and another pick. ill take that also

FOR THE NEXT 3 YEARS WILL BE REBUILDING THIS DAMAGE TEAM FROM THE MISTAKES OF IRELAND THE GARAGE MANGER ,THEN WE WILL FIRE THE NEW COACH AND MANAGER AND LIFE WILL GO ON ..............

Second-half offense:

Punt, punt, punt, punt, fumble, interception, downs.

Craig, fisher would be the only vet head coach I'd like to see. He has some unfinished business in the NFL. The others stomachs might be full.

I like Detroit and Cleveland this week for all the bettors out there.

Can we get Cheech and Chongqing to run the team instead of Ireland and Sparano? Couldn't do any worse!

Good point dusty, San Diego seems to have done OK without Eli although the giants won the trade and got the ring. However, I think rivers would've got one too if they weren't saddled with 2the of he worst coaches in NFL playoff history in schottenheimer and turner

I dont believe Miami went 0-16 when we landed Marino, in fact Shula did some trading and moved up..But thats not realy the point here anyway. There are several good prospects coming up in this next draft, you dont need to loose 16 games to get one..I can remember not to long ago how everyone was bent on a certain QB out of Notre Dame, people were willing to sell the stadium and were outraged when we passed on him..im not disagreeing this organization is fkd, poor decision making, trades,cuts etc..But this team does have a vast amount of talent also, why should they or the fans suffer the humilation of 0-16 for
1) an unproven QB, thats not even known to be entering the draft for sure..
2) we need to start carrying fire Ireland signs at the games, and cheer the players on.
3) if you dont have the man in place to properly assess the talent, and find the proper pick 0-16 aint done you squat..

Craig, the knock on Fisher really has nothing to do with how the Vince Young situation was handled.

It's about 10 of his 16 seasons ending with 8 or more loses.

Heck, Leno was using dolphin material since after week 3.

Mark & Dusty, I'm not saying that scenario wouldn't work out also. I'm just saying it's a very legit possibility a Manning or Elway type situation happens.

I don't care what happens either way to be honest. Based on the last picture I saw of Luck, he looks Amish with his beard thing. Not sure he'd mesh well in S. Florida LOL

RJ,

Your point is well made. Philly would be the ideal landing spot for Jeff Fisher and Houston will be desirable for a coach too, should they miss the playoffs and Kubiak be fired. Only consolation for us is that neither division is particularly strong and for my money Philly is still the best team in their division.

I would put Andy Reid near the top of the list but I think he needs some time off after the pressure cooker of many years in Philly. If we miss on Fisher and Cowher doesn't return then I think we have a problem because I don't see the next best option. I'm not a fan of Coughlin if he gets the boot in NY. Do we then turn to a guy like Schottenheimer? Dungy's out. Gruden's out. Billick? There aren't great options after Fisher and Cowher. My only hope is that Ross has all this figured out ahead of time and doesn't mess it up.

Joe,

I think after Bellichik's few seasons in Cleveland you could say the same thing about him. Seems to have turned out OK. Yeah, I know, Brady has part to do with that. I'm just saying not all of Fisher's losing seasons had to do with him. He had an owner who really hurt his changes. Jeff Fisher is a REALLY good coach. This can't be debated. You don't coach as long as he did with one team under the circumstances he had to deal with without being a quality head coach.

mark no way on detroit, take the falcons plus 4 ,probaly win the game outright. lions are a fraud. much improved but not ready to make playoffs


I dont believe Miami went 0-16 when we landed Marino, in fact Shula did some trading and moved up..

Posted by: finfaneurope | October 19, 2011 at 12:06 PM

=======================================

There was no trading up to get Marino. He was there when Miami selected 27th in that draft.

Excellent points from finfaneurope @ 12:06

Craig, excellent point with Belichick.

Wind the clock back to that time, folks. Remember who Bill Belichick was back then? A guy who had done little to nothing in Cleveland and was known more for his toxic relationship with the press than anything memorable as a Head Coach.

There was no excitement in New England when he was hired, and after his first 5-11 season there the feeling was this was yet another career assistant in over his head as the top guy.

But, y'know, when Tom Brady falls into your lap (literally) you can go from "idiot" to "genius" pretty fast.

As for Fisher, 100% that he was saddles with a HORRIBLE owner in Bud Adams. I believe he would instantly transform the Dolphins (or anyone else) into a much more disciplined and intelligent team and he has ALWAYS been known to attract a top-flight staff of assistants.

I think there's some folks who believe certain coaches have a magic wand and can win with whatever talent is on hand.

That's never been the case, and never will be. Shula couldn't do it, Belichick couldn't do it, Landry couldn't do it. Nobody. All struggled to win when they had less than adequate talent, regardkless of how good they were at teaching and motivating.

There are no magic wands or pixie dust, nor can ANY coach overcome a talent deficiency when the guys on the other sidelines have more (especially at QB).

Yeah, some coaches are clearly better than others nut NONE will win without the players to get it done. Believing otherwise is delusional.

Oh, Debbie! You and that pet clam of yours!

Craig M

Many highly successful coaches were assistants before they became head coaches. (Walsh, Belichek, Payton, McCarthy) Nobody starts out as a head coach. There is a path you work up from. Track records also show that very few head coaches have had much success on two different teams. Shula, Parcells, maybe Holmgrem.

The idea is to hire whoever you believe will be the most competent person, regardless of whether they are a former coach or assistant.

id take cowher over fisher but i like both. but i can tell u from what we are all hearing is that ross will hire a coach who loves offense so it excites the casual fan more. thats why gruden was at the top of his list to begin with. carl peterson will help him with the search. he def wants to find a mccarthy or payton type of coach

Dusty, funny you say that because I think Atlanta and matt Ryan are frauds this year. I don't think they'll make the playoffs. Matt Stafford is on fire, suh is a very bad man, and the lions are also coming off a loss.

And if that doesn't convince you, Ronnie brown is a lion!!!!

Esta mañana he visto 'The Price Is Right' y estaba muy impresionado con el pene de Drew Carey! Se podía ver el contorno de la misma en los pantalones y que parecía ser enorme! Creo que tenía una erección durante el "Showcase Showdown 'también!

What if we are still cruising along, sucking for Luck by week 16 and 17? And what if the Pats and or Jets have a playoff seed sewn up - and their game against Miami is meaningless to them? They could be faced with having no interest in doing anything that would help a division opponent put themselves in position to get better in the years to come. We could actually have two teams playing each other - each hoping the other wins.

Let me toss another HC name out there

Marc Trestman - HC of the Montreal.

Check out his coaching history before you hang me. He has been with a lot of winning teams.

I don't think it's a matter of who's down with 0-fer or not, what'll happen will happen. The players are trying hard, but missing. The coaches try hard but fail. That's happening whether anyone likes it or not. So be prepared for 0-fer. No one should like it, or even be down with it, but ya gonna git it anywho.

Somebody has to win the god-amned Game and I rather be us.

I tell you NFL, if you see suck for luck effort in the part of any Team this weekend, you have to take action.

Great points Craig M. If we do get to a point where is officially a job opening, I hope many names are considered for interviews, including many on this blog today. They should talk to as many good football minds as possible.

Crash - Trestman is not so crazy. I've been calling for this name too - Joe Philbin, OC, Green Bay.

Here's what's truly disgusting about this whole episode. Our best QB in a decade is JAY FIEDLER!

Doesn't that make you want to gauge your eyes out?

dusty, Ross must be reading my posts. I was on board with Andy Reid (if he's available) for exactly that reason (he's an offensive genius).

Oh and another name I haven't heard mentioned as a candidate but maybe should be. Gruden. No, not John. His brother, Jay. OC for Cincinnati. He may not be ready just yet, but he's been a HC in other leagues and is helping an offense with a rookie QB, rookie WR and 2nd year TE to a winning record. Anybody having success with young talent should be an option for a team looking to rebuild.

ronnie brown is complete garbage. slowest back in the nfl

Besides being a Jet does anyone know anything about Brian Schottenheimer?

He may already have been listed and I missed it but hey, I missed it so just throwing another name in the trough.

I haven't been following the SUCK for LUCK movement very closely, but as a fan of the team, I have a VERY hard time watching the game and rooting for them to lose. The idea that each loss brings us a better chance at a high draft pick certainly eases the pain, but watching and rooting against Miami is not in me. I can't do it.

It is like hoping to fall down and break my leg so I can spend the afternoon with the cute nurse in the X-Ray department.

Lips, in Toronto, you'd be spending a lot more than an afternoon in the emergency ward with a broken leg.

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