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2013: The lighter side of Healthcare.gov

2014 might be the year Healthcare.gov reaches its goal of enrolling seven million people, but 2013 will be remembered as the year the federal online health insurance site enrolled six.

From "monkey court" to "If you like your heath plan you can keep your health plan" to the 41st. House of Representative's vote to repeal the Affordable Care Act, enjoy these out-takes of comic relief that made health insurance the most talked-about product of 2013.

And have a happy, dare we say, healthy, 2014.

May, June, July, August, Sep. ... The House of Representatives brought the vote to repeal or defund Obamacare up to 41 times.

"House Speaker and good soruce of beta carotene John Boehner is holding this vote for the best possible reasons: 'Come on, mom, the older Congress got to vote against Obamacare, it's not fair. Why can't we new repreresentatives have hollow partisanship! What am I gonna tell my friends?"  -- The Colbert Report. 

October 1: Out of millions of visitors, Healthcare.gov managed to enroll six on opening day.  

"The ObamaCare website won't be accessible at night due to maintenance. And it won't be accessible during the day due to 'it sucking.'" –Conan O'Brien

"It seems when you type in your age, it's confusing because it's not clear if they want the age you are right now, or the age you'll be when you finally log in." –Jay Leno

October 24:  "No, I will not yield to this monkey court or whatever." Rep. Frank Pallone (D-NJ) slammed the  House Energy and Commerce Committee during its hearing on HealthCare.gov's botched launch. 

"There was some good news today for embattled Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius. Obamacare will cover all her injuries after the White House throws her under the bus. She is totally covered." –Jay Leno 

Throughout October: Just when things couldn't be worse for the President's healthcare roll-out, insurance companies started sending out policy cancellation notices to millions of Americans, bringing a 2010 Obama promise back to bite him. PolitiFact's  2013 "Lie ot the Year." 

"President Obama said he is sorry that some Americans have lost their existing health coverage due to Obamacare. I think he's getting a little desperate. Today he said if you like your complete lack of coverage, you can keep your complete lack of coverage." –Jay Leno

"Many scam artists are trying to take advantage of the problems with the Obamacare website. Experts say you can tell it's a scam site if you enter your information and it quickly and efficiently signs you up for healthcare." –Conan O'Brien. 

Dec. 12 The Obama administration launched a PR counter-offensive on Twitter: " because nobody should go broke just because they get sick." http://go.wh.gov/c8nakG 

Within minutes the Washington Post was tracking the Photoshopped results


 @jaketapper and Washington Post photo

"The Obama administration asks Hollywood to work positive mentions of ObamaCare into its TV shows and movies. So AMCs new zombie drama is titled: “The Walking Dead But Not Due to Preexisting Conditions.” -- Conan O'Brien



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Jaddy Baddy

Time was, anteObama and the Sociacrats, when the
American employee had fifty thousand fellow employees
to go shopping with for a health care plan. That's a Lot
of purchasing power. The American employee could
really drive a bargain in them days. Had a healthcare
officer, a corporate paid insurance professional; on the
job, to explain all options, and more importantly, intervene
in any disputes between healthcare provider, employee
and the insurance company. Health care officers were
generally overly officious bureaucratic pains in the rump,
but, with fifty thousand, or even a couple of hundred
policies to bandy, they carried a lot of weight with
insurance companies, and they could push where the
individual couldn't. And it was all subsidized by the
company, Not the taxpayer.

Now, comes Obamacrap, the corporation can shuffle All
employees off to the ACA website, cut the healthcare plan,
entirely, shut down all health insurance subsidies, cut the
health insurance officer and staff completely from the
payroll, and put that money to good use, say a sales
junket, executive bonuses, CEO perks. Congratulations,
DA American tax payer, now you ain't got 50,000,
or two hundred fellow employees to go shopping for
insurance, it's just you and your lonesome, out in the
cold cruel world of the ACA, driving the best bargain you
can, alone, against the insurance company.

Got a problem? No company insurance officer to
intervene. Don't like your coverage, we'll sell you a
more expensive plan, don't like that , we'll cut you loose
to go shopping alone, out in the cold ACA. NO corporate
subsidies, NO group health care, you are on your own.
You gonna get a lawyer and Sue? We'll see your puny
stinking lawyer and show up in court with our entire Legal
Department, LOL ROFL. I suppose you Could call your
congressman, like he/she is gonna side with you against
the insurance industry. Hah, hah, ho, ho.

Now you got a real choice; a comprehensive health care
policy, the mortgage, your IRA, or the kids' college tuition,
all on your own dime. You Can choose any of the latter, but
you better pray to God you don't catch anything worse than
a common cold.

Americans, too ignorant to know when you got it good,
followin' a DA socialist down the garden path. DA, DA,

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