Idol Watch

Idol New York/Puerto Rico auditions

Idol producers already expressed disappointment with the first Puerto Rico auditions -- so why broadcast? We'll see what they mean shortly, I'm not feeling well so I might feel like punching out my screen if things go as expected ...

I'll say this, the first San Juan contestant, Jorge Nunez, was pretty darn good. He sang My Way in Spanish and Wonderful World in English and did a nice job, especially in Spanish. New York bombed with a girl named Adeola who quit her day job because she was so sure she'd sail through to Hollywood. She stank worse than the Hudson while doing Jennifer Hudson. Simon kindly called her boss and got her her job back.

The return of last season's foul-mouthed, middle-finger shooting Alexis Cohen (no relation, mind you) gave New York a funny send off. She tried the friendlier approach and offered a weird spin on my favorite Madonna song, Like a Prayer. I've heard worse, even from signed alternative acts. But she's not for Idol. Amusing to watch tho. The last girl from Puerto Rico, Patricia Roman was not very good, even Paula said no. But she won over enough judges to get another shot.

Back in P.R., Jessica screamed Celine Dion's incredibly difficult I Surrender, a song that tripped up even Kelly Clarkson in the first season, but she also stayed in tune and should have been given another shot, but her pleading screwed up her chances -- especially when the women were going to let her try another song. Pity.

Melinda Camille, in NY, says she loves to dance naked and unfortunately did not do so tonight. But she sang fair enough. Not great, not really even good, but her demeanor is radiant and she's worth seeing again.

Jackie Tohn, who my pal Lesley may know from camp (check the comments) got a pass to Hwd with her husky voice and quirky personality. Hated the Jason Mraz song she did, irritating. A little better on the other one they graciously let her try.

Joel, the kid with the giant iPod, sounded better than Joe Jonas but not good enough for Idol. Nick Mitchell, or Norman as they called him, is the reason these family values groups keep winning elections. What an annoying man.

I liked Monique Garcia from P.R. and not just cuz she brought her charismatic 9 year old brother Christopher as a lucky rabbits' foot. She sang the Supremes song well, and was OK on the dreary Christina Aguilera song. Why are Aguilera's song so unpleasant? Anyhow, 2 no's from Randy and Kara were unjustied, Paula and Simon's double-vote wisely give her another shot.

Kelly Clarkson's new single doesn't "Suck" with fans. It's No. 1.

Kelly Clarkson's fancifully titled new single, My Life Would Suck Without You, rockets 97-1 on this week's Billboard Hot 100 thanks to its availability as a download. Sure nice to see a No. 1 single without the name T.I. or Beyonce attached.

Idol Salt Lake City, Utah auditions

Can Idol play it any safer than last night? With the music industry in tatters and sales for Idol-related albums not especially hot commodoties, the judges were passing the safe, familiar and bland on to Hollywood. Most regrettably, when they were confronted by someone different, like the crying guitarist Tuesday, the wimped out and sent the guy home.

Beyond that, the only watercooler worthy moment was Paula's latest loopy antic (she walked off set for some reason, only to briefly return and the judges were way to touchy feely weird). It was all a crashing bore. Here's how Wednesday went from Salt Lake City, Utah, home of last season's sweet and syrupy David Archuleta ..:

First up, David Osmond, 28, (left), son of Alan Osmond of the famous Osmond Family. Both son and dad have MS but, like other Osmonds, David can sing quite well. You could tell he was a born harmonizer from the way he handled that Take 6 song, and the judges, clueless about true talent, failed to recognize his obvious talents. (Altho Paula was the sole astute judge this time for noticing how his audition reflected his harmony skills. Wisely, they passed him thru.) He's good looking, can sing and has charisma, how could they even question this after the nonsense they passed last nite? And I just realized, I'm probably one of the only people my age -- 45 -- who never watched Donny & Marie's show in the '70s and never bought an Osmonds album or single. I wasn't trying to be cool, I just never responded to them then. Donny's 1989 single Soldier of Love was catchy, tho,

Oddities followed: Tara Matthews dressed like a goth whore, sang like a baby according to Simon, and claimed to have ESP. You think she should have figured out she couldn't sing? Chris Kirkham brought his friend who dressed as a bunny and it blew the audition for him. Without the bunny as a distraction, Chris' nasal whine might have passed muster on this show or with some of the judges.

Next up: the judges once again rewarded a clone, this one of Amy Winehouse. Frankie Jordan can certainly sing and sound like Amy Wino (and she's better looking) but we have that sound already. I'd make her sing again and do it with her own voice. But then the judges turned around and passed a girl who was different. Megan Corckrey, a divorced mom, had a real jazzy voice (too jazzy for my taste) but a delightful personality and striking look. Warm and charming, she earned a pass. I just hope no more Can't Help Lovin' That Man jazz turns.

Austin Sisneros, class president at his Utah high school gets F for song choices: A tuneless banality from Train and some soporific Raffi thing, but he gets much better marks for his voice, charm and tenacity. He earned a ticket to Hollywood but hopefully will learn some better music.

Taylor Vaifanua, an island girl at 5-11, had a true voice and it was no question she was going to Hollywood. Randy thought she reminded him of Jordin Sparks and I can see that in this 16 year old. But I also see a little Cher in there if she dresses up with more flair and brings out a freewheeling spirit. She's got the voice and I think she could be fun.

Idol's best audition night thus far closes with the heartwarming tale of Rose Flack (right) who lost her dad at 13 and mom at 15 and who has oodles of charm and an interesting voice. She chose Carole King's I Feel the Earth Move. Not an easy song to sing sans the pounding piano. But Flack, unlike the other clones, sang in her own voice and style and proved memorable. Another observation: These Salt Lake City people, the ones they showed anyway, sure are nice. I enjoyed watching seemingly decent people (save the ghastly ESP woman) try out for the show.

Tomorrow night we venture to New York and Puerto Rico and the producers have already said Puerto Rico bombed. See you then.

Idol Tuesday auditions from Jacksonville

Another Tuesday, another auditions show. Hollywood and the finals can't come soon enough.

That said, given how the judges are passing through these talentless twits so far, we might be in for a long Hollywood process. The first kid tonight, Joshua Ulloa hit a correct note every so often on Marvin Gaye's Let's Get It On but added so many gimmicky flourishes he just came across as a pain in the butt. Simon calls him "Inspector Gadget" and still says "yes to Hwd? Why? Then the other pseudo judges follow in line like ducks. Next was some ear-splitting pretty girl, Sharon something or other who sounded like Britney. We already have one train wreck pop star who can't sing. We don't need another, even if she brings her cute dog with her to her audition.

And what a tacky intro, using Randy Jackson's name and its root in Jacksonville to tout his nonevent time in Journey. Dudes, he was a SESSION musician in Journey, he was never a true member and when he was playing in Journey in the mid to late 80s their peak had long passed.

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The strangeness continues but the talent remains elusive. Someone named Julissa wants to be the first Latin American Idol but she sang Whitney so bad Simon said she "didn't make it sound nice." Well, duh. Whitney Houston songs aren't nice, they are haughty, pre-fabricated banalities. Julissa still got a pass. Another guy was so distraught that some guy he just met failed his audition he couldn't stop crying long enough to get through his own tone deaf attempt at Boyz II Men. These Tuesday shows are just so bad lately.

Another problem with the judges is they are not championing originality. They passed that pretty girl Jasmine or whatever her name is who did the Fergie song but all she did was mimic Fergie's tone. We have one Fergie. One's more than enough. The show is not promoting artists, they are feeding pop music's cookie cutter mentality. At least, that's what it feels like. Granted, we aren't seeing anyone good tonight.

That crybaby with the guitar had the best voice of the night, at least he didn't sound like everyone else, and yet they flunked him. I would have flunked him for being a little wuss, but he should have gotten a golden ticket given that he could sing and didn't try to copy anyone like everyone who has gone through has. Terrible show tonite.

Tomorrow we go to Salt Lake City Utah and meet a new Osmond.

Katharine McPhee signs with Verve

Season five runner-up Katharine McPhee, one of the prettiest of all Idol contestants and easily one of the least interesting, has signed a recording deal with Verve Records. She's recording now, Billboard reports. Album should arrive late this year.

The label president says the release will showcase "many new sides to her talents," which, to me, means she still hasn't figured out who and what she is, her major impediment as a personality and artist the first time around on an awful RCA pop/R&B stumble. That project was known more for its tacky ad campaign (cheesecake photos of the singer accompanied the CD in presskits) and sexy album cover and ill-advised urban tracks. Hopefully, she'll have it worked out and craft something of value with her second chance.

Melinda Doolittle brings soul back to the genre on debut CD

American Idol has such a reputation for cheese and for putting image and shtick over true old-fashioned artistry, despite a handful of viable contestants over the years, it's difficult to convince non-fans of the program that it can unleash upon us a true recording artist.

Melinda Doolittle's soulful collection of originals and retro blues and soul revivals, Coming Back to You (due in stores Feb. 3), is a huge cut above the TV talent show norm. I have a friend -- a colleague, actually -- who was a pop music critic of distinction and who started his career chronicling music many years ago as a teenager writing for Soul magazine, back when the music it reported in its pages actually had soul. Gladys Knight is his woman (his wife understands) and he moved on from covering music in the 90s when much of it became pre-fabricated, disposable and soulless.

Melinda's new CD could be the first release, yet, to come out as a result of the Idol phenom I would hand to him and say, "Check THIS album out,'' and do so without fear of a crack upside the back of my head for polluting his Temptations-loving iPod.

Melinda's that real. Al Green, Tina Turner, Gladys Knight and Sarah Vaughan are not physically on this 13-track independently released disc (Hi Fi Recordings) but every bit of their auditory DNA Melinda, 31, absorbed while listening to their records as a young girl in Tennessee bleeds through each authentic note of this 45-minute disc. She can handle rich, late-night pop-jazz balladry (Wonder Why) on to Hi Records/Motown-era uptempo soul (It's Your Love, Declaration of Love -- a feisty song Celine Dion previously recorded -- and Fundamental Things.) She can get into deep-dish blues, too, on a cover of Robert Johnson's Dust My Broom. and totally make you forget she came from the same stage as Sanjaya et al.

She finished third in 2007 on Idol's sixth season behind the likable teen Jordin Sparks who has had some catchy contemporary pop hits and the ridiculous beat-boxer Blake Lewis who fizzled immediately into an Idol footnote. But she finishes first in class and quality on this evocative, robust recording adults can groove to.

Mainstream radio probably won't come to the party, so do yourself a favor and track Coming Back to You down on the 3rd. You won't be sorry.

Melinda Doolittle releases her own CD soon

Melinda Doolittle, the most gifted vocalist of the sixth season and third place finalist, releases her debut album on Feb. 3. Producer is Mike Mangini (Joss Stone), and the album, Coming Back To You, is said to have a retro R&B, soul, blues and jazz sound, in keeping with the chops she displayed on Idol.

 

David Cook starts his own tour

David Cook, the current Idol champ, launches his new tour Feb. 13 in Tallahasee according to PopEater.com and it runs through April 25 in Tulsa. No South Florida dates (not at this point, anyway).

David says on a press release "U2 is the inspiration behind the tour." Does David realize when he says grand falutin things like that he's only drawing comparisons in which he can only lose?

Photo: MCT

Idol auditions: Louisville Kentucky

To my Idol Watch fans: I won't be posting live tonight during American Idol. Going to South Beach Comedy Fest to catch Cheech & Chong. Feel free to post your comments on this thread and when I return at some point tonight I'll watch Idol on the DVR and post my thoughts afterward.

In a nutshell, a much better show than Tuesday's dreadful waste of an hour. Louisville, Ky had some talented performers in both parts of tonight's show. I liked Brent Keith who sang Bad Company. Unlike some former faux rockers (David Cook, this means you), Brent had a rock edge to his voice and sounds like he actually has heard some real rock and roll in his life. Good job. The judges liked Matt Giraud but he sounded too quivery, Maroon5 for my tastes but there might be something there.

Lenseshe Young, who came from a single parent family and has known struggle, or so the story went, had a quirky personality, sang an original song that wasn't bad, and she was the judge's favorite by far. Heartwarming that she goes through, I think she'll make it beyond the Hollywood rounds if she holds it together. Good end to a decent auditions show.

One problem this season, tho: Where are the country singers? We've seen one so far, Mark Mudd, whose ancestor is the Mudd who fixed John Wilkes Booth's busted leg after Booth shot Lincoln and jumped off the balcony. Mark sang George Jones' novelty hit, White Lightning, but it went over Simon's head and it wasn't a smart choice. He wasn't good but it does make me long for a country talent to showcase this season. We're getting mostly bland popsters.

Simon boots fourth judge in U.K. Idol equivalent

From my pal Lesley: Simon Cowell's boorish behavior knows no boundaries -- or borders. He gave new Britain's Got Talent judge Kelly Brook the boot after just six days on the job, reveals Perez Hilton. Brook was added as a fourth judge to breathe new life into the UK show, but she didn't have the necessary skills to impress Simon. Watch your back, Kara DioGuardi!

Me now: Gosh! I can only hope! DioGuardi has been nothing but a sullen, listless and unpleasant addition to Idol this season. She can write a formulaic pop song but she has no TV quotient personality in my view.

Read Hilton's piece here.

http://perezhilton.com/2009-01-20-simon-cowell-shows-no-mercy-dumps-model-as-uk-reality-show-judge-after-only-6-shows