Ready for some live Idol blogging and Twitter commentary (follow http://twitter.com/HowardCohen) and so hoping for some pop culture moment like another Pants on the Ground from tonight's show. C'mon contestants, bring it.
That moment won't come from the first up -- or at any time tonight:
If Neil Goldstein really has an IQ of 168, he would know how be less annoying and obnoxious and wouldn't have forgotten Meat Loaf's lyrics. And if this brat wants to go to Hollywood, he best be smart enough to figure out a way to buy a plane ticket cuz he ain't going at Idol's expense.
Pastor Jim Ranger (above) would need a park ranger to find the proper key in his original song, because this married father lost that key deep in the woods. Surprisingly, the judges liked his voice and balked only at the fact he'd have to leave his church should he become an Idol. He gets a golden ticket, anyway, but he should just consider it a free trip to Hollywood.
Meantime, is it just me or is guest judge Avril Lavigne's affected demeanor and devil's outfit all a bit irksome? She's like a teenager playing dressup to annoy mom and dad.
A bit surprised at Simon calling Mary Powers "a cliche" as he sits next to a cliche (Avril) but Mary's true rock voice on Pat Benatar's challenging Love Is a Battlefield easily earns her a ticket to Hollywood. Her 8-year-old daughter was adorable as she got to meet her Idol, Simon, whom she praises for his negativity.
Simon would need all that negativity at his disposal for this season's first Adam Lambert wannabe, AJ, who croaked a Living Colour hit, but lacked Adam's Cult of Personality, not to mention the ability to open his mouth while singing. Painful. At least he wasn't a tool as he met his dismissal head-on.
I wouldn't mind finding this season's Adam Lambert but, alas, we might be stuck with a Danny Gokey clone in the bespectacled Andrew Garcia who comes complete with requisite sob story, glasses, and a voice sure to become annoying fast. Bet he becomes a finalist. Sigh.
New guest judge Katy Perry (I Kissed a Girl) disses the real judges for beating LA traffic by arriving to the studio via helicopter. Sounded smart on their part to me.
Self-important Katy, who appears as genuine as Monopoly money, was quickly freaked out by Austin who Mick Jaggerized Cheap Trick's Surrender. "Are they frisked before they come in here?" the oh-so-delicate Katy fretted. That's one boy that won't convert her to kissing guys.
She might want to kiss the delightful Tasha Layton, tho, who wins her golden ticket thru a Joss Stone tune and then turns to the camera: "I'm going to Hollywood. Now what do I do?" Cute.
"I feel dirty," Perry says after Jason Greene goes blue and does the Divinyls' I Touch Myself, shamelessly comes on to Simon and gives Ryan his phone number. I really don't know what to say after that, except, ewwww.
Unless I'm forgetting any previous fights between guest judge and regular judge, Kara DioGuardi and the affected Katy Perry deliver the first such cat fight on Idol. "This is not a Lifetime movie," Katy huffed after foster kid (above) Chris Golightly's decent Stand By Me audition.
All in all, not a very pleasant night of auditions, sunk, mostly, by two pop stars of minor talent and massive ego and few memorable auditions. Of the bunch, I'd like to see more of Tasha and Mary and maybe Chris. Tomorrow it's off to the Big D for Dallas auditions. Bet it's better.
I just got in and am on Tivo delay but is Neil Goldstein kidding? There's no way he's a member of the tribe either. And they couldn't find anyone else besides Avril Lavigne?
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 08:34 PM
hello?
Posted by: Ladybugnine | January 26, 2010 at 08:35 PM
HoCo, I liked the pastor!
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 08:39 PM
the first adam lambert hasn't proven himself yet, who needs another?
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 08:42 PM
LOVE Mary!! Talk about cliche, Simon, look right next to you at Avril Lavigne
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 08:45 PM
AJ was atrocious. And I bet Adam liked his demo.
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 08:48 PM
Ok, love Tasha. the rest I can't be bothered with. The gang member spawn was pretty good tho. Not as annoying as Danny Gokey--yet.
Posted by: Lesley | January 26, 2010 at 09:06 PM
I have a feeling Andrew will quickly channel the annoying Gokey factor. He already was bugging me tonight.
Posted by: HoCo | January 26, 2010 at 09:10 PM
missed the show but always love your commentary! (And Sasha, too)
Posted by: AsandraGuide | January 27, 2010 at 09:16 AM
Sacha Cohen playing Freddie Mercury... can't wait to see it! I'm sure he will Freddie justice.
Posted by: jessyjames | September 21, 2010 at 06:50 AM