Idol Watch

Crystal & Lee sign record deals

19 wasted no time in signing both winner Lee DeWyze and runnerup Crystal Bowersox to recording deals, less than 24 hours after Lee's crowning. Lee winds up on RCA, Crystal on Jive. Both are under the same 19/BMG banner. Expect both to release albums post tour for the Christmas market as in years' past, reports Billboard.Com.

Billboard.Com article here.

For more follow on http://twitter.com/HowardCohen

Lee-Crystal, Simon send-off, fail to generate big numbers

 (Photo: AP)
 True, Lee DeWyze and Crystal Bowersox hardly made for must-watch TV. Two weaker American Idol finalists we've yet to see. But some might have thought the sending off of Simon Cowell, the return of Paula Abdul for a toast and the performances of a host of fossils unearthed from the Night of the Living Dead set (Chicago, Hall & Oates, Joe Cocker, Bee Gees, Alice Cooper, Michael McDonald) might have lured more viewers. ... Well, maybe not the fossils, who, one and all, sounded terrible.

But, alas, Idol's ninth season finale scored the lowest finale rating since season one's -- when season one was a mere summer replacement series. Fox lured about 24.2-million people -- 16 percent off the 28.8 million who watched Kris Allen triumph over Adam Lambert. (Maybe that's why viewers feel Idol has jumped the shark.) Even among younger viewers, coveted by networks for whatever reason, the numbers dipped. Among adults ages 18 to 49, the finale averaged an 8.2 rating, another plunge of 18 percent from last year's 10.0. A rating point in that demographic equals 1.3-million people.

American Idol Winner! column scores

 Photo: AP
Today's Idol Watch Winner! column, announcing the Lee DeWyze victory, No. 1 most hit story on Miami Herald site this morning.

Thanks, readers. My favorite reader comment:

"So Mr COHEN is saying that America got it wrong (again)? Should we therefore change the rules? Since he is always correct and America is getting it wrong so often, we could simply let Mr COHEN decide the winner and rename the show COHEN's Idol. I don't think so!":

Read more: http://www.miamiherald.com/2010/05/27/1650513/winner.html#storylink=omni_popular#ixzz0p94SQMu5

Hmm. Actually, I LIKE that idea! Fox, are you reading?

For more follow on Twitter @ www.twitter.com/HowardCohen

American Idol Season finale: Lee DeWyze wins

 Photo: AP
 Just two hours and seven minutes left of American Idol's ninth season. Lee or Crystal? Eh, that's not what we're tuning in for. Rather, we want to see how the show bids farewell to its top judge, Simon Cowell. Follow along and on http://twitter.com/HowardCohen for one more time.

• Does Lee know where he is or have the zombies eaten his brain? He looked so dull during Ryan's blustery introduction.
• Alice Cooper joins the contestants to sing 1971's School's Out and the Top 12 are all wondering: Who is this old guy and why's his mascara running down his face?
• Barry and Robin Gibb of the Bee Gees reunite to ask the musical question, How Deep Is Your Love? Mine's deep enough to forgive the worn voices (especially Barry's) -- mostly cuz I'm hoping these two reteam to write some new songs. RIP Maurice. The Gibbs were joined by the season's most likable finalist Aaron Kelly (prematurely booted) and Siobhan Magnus.
• Yacht Rocker Michael McDonald joins Michael Lynche to sing the Doobies' Takin' it to the Streets which, four seasons ago, became Taylor Hicks' song. Given how ragged it sounded tonight, one has to wish Taylor would have come out of his seat and grabbed the mike away from the Mikes and sing the tune. That's how bad McDonald sounded.
• Alleged comedian Dane Cook did an aborted roast to Simon. Aborted, because a commercial popped up right in the middle. Humourous Interruptus. Several Idol audition rejects -- including my favorite in the cape -- return but don't do anything.
• Can someone get Amber Riley from Glee to take the mike on this Beautiful remake?
• Christina Aguilera bailed on her summer tour so she could promote this tuneless ballad she just sang? Talk about bad career moves. And, sweetie, Gaga called and wants her hair and eyelashes back.
• The guys start off singing Hall + Oates I Can't Go For That (No Can Do). I can't go for that, no really. No can do. Daryl and John turn up to rescue the performance. Of the grizzled vets so far none of these kids have heard of, Daryl Hall sounds the most passable.
• Then, Alanis Morrissette joins Crystal to sing You Oughta Know and I'd have loved to hear her sing that line. You know the one I'm referring to. But, alas, no lyric malfunctions.
• Bret Michaels is one tough dude. And, thank you, Apprentice winner for rescuing your Poison oldie from Casey's goat throat. Bret earned the night's biggest hand, thus far, it appears.
• So THIS is why Peter Cetera quit Chicago so long ago: the prospect of having to sing his oldies with Lee DeWyze on Idol.
• What's it tell you about this season of Idol when Gen. Larry Platt & William Hung, singing the former's Pants on the Ground, shows more flair and personality than the two finalists?
• Best moment of the night; the return of Paula Abdul. The return of Paula reminds us what Idol has missed all season on judge's panel: chemistry. She jokes about the real reason she left the show: A shared love child. "It's your turn to feed him," she quips. "It won't be the same without you but it will go on," she says. Simon, almost emotional, responds: "I didn't think I was going to be this emotional but the show goes on. Whoever's going to replace me, the truth is, you are the judges and you've done an incredible job,'' he says as every Idol winner except David Cook and many finalists sing a song in his honor. Was very nice.
• The return of the living dead: Joe Cocker sings With a Little Help From My Friends with Crystal and Lee.
• Lee wins. The fix was in. He's choked up. "I don't know. It's amazing. So happy. Never been happier. No words to describe it." After Lee once again butchered his band's Beautiful Day, ailing Bono pressed the button on his hospital bed asking for more morphine.
• I have some words, but am on deadline now for print column. Thank you Idol Watchers. Simon out. Howard out. Have a great summer.

Idol ratings slide. Again.

American Idol's Season 9 Crystal-Lee showdown finale performance show lost another four million viewers, another 15 percent or so, compared to last year's Adam-Kris battle for the top. Nielsen posted an overnight 19.6 million viewers. Last year's show earned 23 million.

Perhaps Lee's sleep-inducing performance put everyone to bed early because nothing exploded in the ratings last night. The Dancing With the Stars finale that aired after Idol had its lowest finale ratings (18.1 million) and Glee's Gaga/Kiss episode pulled 11.4 million viewers, not a marked improvement over its average numbers.

Perhaps it was too much TV on one night. Or people were turned off to find Pussycat Doll Nicole Sherzinger, a professional dancer, winning DWTS crown. And maybe Gaga has reached the overexposure stage. She sure has with me.

That said, aside from the now near worthless Idol, DWTS and a particularly dramatic Glee made for some enjoyable TV moments Tuesday night.

For more follow on http://twitter.com/HowardCohen

The showdown: Lee v. Crystal; DWTS & Glee

 Photo: PictureGroup
 The long and tedious ninth season of Idol finally winds down tonight with the final performance show of Simon Cowell's American Idol career. That's the aspect I'm most curious about, how they bid farewell to the one judge that has kept our attention for eight seasons. We'll find out tomorrow in a 2 hour and 7 minute slog starting at 8 p.m. on Fox.

I say eight seasons, not nine, because Simon has clearly phoned it in this season. It's egregious given that he certainly collected his paycheck and hasn't delivered on it. There's been no interplay between he and the other judges. The much-hyped Simon-Ellen fireworks never materialized. He hasn't had one memorable quip or insult. 

One can't blame him for being bored, tho. Most of America is, given the falling ratings and the abysmal sales for the Idol cast CD. Glee, it ain't.

 Crystal Bowersox and Lee DeWyze are the two least interesting final two contestants the show has coughed up yet. Neither have star quality. Neither have memorable voices. Of the two, Crystal is the better singer but she lacks the spark required of major pop stars. The ratty hair is a turn off, too. Lee has a more commercial voice and has already released two albums (both for sale on iTunes) but he hasn't the IT factor either and, until last week, the vocal ability to sing in tune.

My guess is Lee wins, he's got the momentum. Tonight's show could reverse that budding trend. But, for the first time, I don't REALLY care one way or the other. I'm not interested in a Lee OR a Crystal album post-Idol. Or any of the eight other finalists, to be honest.

 Photo: AP
Still, two more shows, tonight and tomorrow, we blog and Twitter live. But I gotta admit, the showdown I really care about tonight takes place on ABC as Dancing With the Stars crowns a 10th season winner starting at 9 p.m. My choice: Olympic skating gold medalist Evan Lysacek and his dance partner Anna Trebunskaya. Evan's grace, skill and the pair's charm these last few months has been a treat. DWTS' professionalism and the chemistry among its judges and host offer a much-needed lesson to follow for Idol producers as Fox brings its franchise back for a 10th season sans Simon (and, my hope if we continue to cover the show, a whole new cast of judges and a new host to replace the increasingly obnoxious Ryan Seacrest who can bring the show in on time and provide entertainment value and freshness, aspects Idol hasn't come close to delivering this year.)

 Photo: Getty Images
Another show to look forward to tonight that guarantees superior singing compared to Lee and Crystal is Glee's Lady Gaga vs. Kiss pairing. It's The Fame Monster's Bad Romance and Poker Face up against Destroyer's Shout It Out Loud and Beth. Now that I can get behind.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Isn't it pathetic that the SOLE memorable performance all season belongs to Gen. Larry Platt's Pants on the Ground audition months ago? Idol gave us one pop culture moment and it wasn't Ellen DeGeneres replacing Paula Abdul. It was a senior citizen activist rapping a catchy as all tune to blast kids for wearing their pants around their knees.

Oh no, the dreaded song repeat, "special" Idol song and producer's pick are what we are getting again. Way to shake things up, Idol. zzzzzzzzzzz

Round one to Crystal. No contest. Lee once again puts us to sleep on a lackluster The Boxer. It was slightly more in tune than the first time,but so what? It's finals and he sleepwalks. Simon wants more passion from Lee. "At this stage that was a kiss on the cheek and I'm looking for a kiss on the lips, not from you," Simon said. Lee and passion are mutually exclusive. Crystal got off to a so-so start on Me and Bobby McGee on the first verse but at least she came alive toward the end like she still cares to be on the show.

Round two to, is it any surprise? Crystal. Dull Lee sings R.E.M.'s Everybody Hurts, producer's pick. Everybody hurts, as in our eyes and ears after watching this paint store schlub wilt on TV. He had two good performances last week but two in a season don't make for a winner. Crystal, on the other hand, sang the boring Black Velvet, one of the most overplayed and uninteresting songs in Idol history. And yet, she sang it to win it, she wants this victory while Lee wants to punch the clock again at Home Depot. Crystal wins it.
"I'm almost allergic to that song," Simon said but he liked it and it's clear why.

The judges keep painting Lee as a novice who grew, but he has already released 2 full albums (on iTunes) so this is as good as he gets. Was that a cover of U2's Beautiful Day? The Idol winners' singles will be covers this year? They couldn't write a new tune for them? And I ask if it was U2 cuz it only vaguely sounded like the old U2 hit under Lee's wavering vocals.

Before tonight, I thought Lee had the momentum to win over the more deserving Crystal. Now, if he does, you'll know something is truly screwy in Idol Land. No competition. Crystal hit some offkey notes on her gospel single, Up to the Mountain, but she can SING and did so with passion and credibility. After tonight, if there's ever been a more lop-sided finale, I can't remember one. Even Kris Allen was closer to the great Adam Lambert last year than Lee is to Crystal right now. So, like Simon on his final critique of his American Idol career, we both go out on a positive. Great job, Crystal. You win.

American Idol's Top Money Earners

   Photo: Getty Images/Tide
 Forbes has announced its latest list of Top 10 American Idol money earners for the past year and, once again, the two most successful winners remain atop the list. No real surprise there. Daughtry, the most popular non-winner, also remains toward the top.

Surprises? Perhaps Kellie Pickler ranking so high (No. 4) though she writes her songs and has toured frequently and Kris Allen making the cut at 10 and the far higher profile Adam Lambert missing out.

The reasons? Though Adam's album sold more than twice as many copies as Kris' there is little money to be made through CD sales, especially if you're just the performer. Songwriters and producers get their cut first. Once you subtract the label's grab there's little left for the artist unless the album sells in the millions and few artists manage that these days.

 Adam's income would come largely from touring and merchandising and his tour just started, or is soon to get underway. Kris' income would likely be the result of those Ford commercials he's landed. One would expect Adam to make the list next year if the tour does well. The one season to fail to make the list this year: Season 3, Fantasia's year. Ruben Studdard, Season 2 winner, and Taylor Hicks, Season 5 victor, also missed.

  1. Kelly Clarkson -- $8 million

  

   2. Carrie Underwood -- $7 million

  

   3. Chris Daughtry -- $5.4 million

  

   4. Kellie Pickler -- $4.3 million

  

   5. David Cook -- $2.3 million

  

   6. Jennifer Hudson -- $2 million

  

   7. Jordin Sparks -- $1.8 million

  

   8. David Archuleta -- $1.4 million

  

   9. Clay Aiken -- $800,000

  

   10. Kris Allen -- $672,000

  

Idol semifinal results

Ready for the Crystal-Lee finale next week? We'll find out for sure in an hour.

That is, if we ever get through this insufferable opening. Listening to these three inarticulate dullards as they struggle to answer Ryan Seacrest's simplistic questions is the very definition of bad television. Seldom has there been a less exciting reality show. How the mighty have fallen.

Every time you think the show can't sink further, it sinks further. Producers gave air time to Perez Hilton to shill his latest "discovery," some no-talent kid named Travis Garland who can't sing, can't dance but somehow managed to get Hilton to pronounce him "better than Justin Timberlake" on national TV. Idol couldn't even manage to stage the performance properly. I just keep telling myself "one more week of this, one more week of this, one more..." Meantime, Justin Bieber did a medley of two of his hits and then concluded by playing a little drums. When puberty robs him of his voice he has a skill to fall back on, one presumes.

For more, follow on Twitter. Next week, ya'll.

To no one's surprise, our finale pits Lee vs. Crystal. Casey goes home. Crystal's visit home tonight, to Toledo, Ohio, was the most interesting of the three.