Have you ever written a check or racked up charge knowing that your spouse isn't going to be happy about whatever it is you are buying? Admit it, we've all done it at least once. But don't you think that being on the same page as your spouse when it comes to money would help give your marriage some oomph?
When you get married, it's unlikely anyone will they tell you that relationships struggle when a wife out earns her husband or when you argue over who spends money and what you spend it on. I can tell you that fighting with your spouse over money is time consuming and draining -- a real impediment to work life balance. Today, Larry Tobin weighs in on the subject of balancing work, marriage and finances. Tobin, co-founder of Habit Changer, is an expert on the awareness of habits with a specialty in how to change them.
Different upbringings, work ethics and hours at the office can create habits we each bring into our relationship. These deep-rooted habits can create wedges and lead to resentment over an imbalance in earning power, control of the check book, or simply figuring out how to financially plan for the future.
Changing these old habits will help you eliminate fights over money. Here are some tips:
Make time for your spouse. Try expressing how you feel about your partner in a way that they will appreciate without spending a dime. Small things like taking the morning off to make breakfast for your partner or simply leaving a sweet note in their briefcase that says you love them go a long way.
Keep a private fund. You work hard and deserve to spend your hard-earned money on yourself from time to time. Try setting up a private fund, placing aside $50 or $100 each for you to spend on yourselves in any way you choose. Spend it as you please, no questions asked.
Be Open. In today’s economy, many of us aren’t earning the same salary we may have been used to. Commissions are down and bonus checks are low. As things scale back, putting yourself out there can feel a little risky, but as a team, couples need to have the tools in place to prepare for the long haul. Remember, financial facts are just numbers. But secrets can hold you back. When you air them, they lose their control over you.
A healthy home life promotes a healthy work life- but it takes your desire and the proper tools to help you break loose of the money habits that impact your relationships. Want to start changing your habits today? Take this fun quiz with your partner to discover how your spending habits differ and what it means to your relationship.