« The latest solution to advancing women in leadership | Main | How to change your business direction in 2011 »

Don't let the haters ruin your day

Holiday cheer? I say, humbug. It is so easy to get crabby this time of year when people cut you off on the road, hop in front of you in the check-out line and mutter stuff under their breath about your over-sugared kids. But my friend Michelle Villalobos of Mivista Consulting sent me an email that put me in a better mood about the craziness of the season. 

She writes: At the supermarket yesterday, I left my purse in the cart so I could reach an item in the isle. A woman walked by, growled at me and said, “Someone should steal your purse. It’ll teach you a lesson.”

Have you been in that situation? Someone is strangely rude for absolutely no reason.

I have found (and research supports) that responding in kind, makes you feel worse in the long run. It will make the situation play through your mind over and over. But “killing them with kindness”, gives you an immediate release from tension. And the situation is quickly forgotten.

So, instead of lashing back, I smiled and thanked her profusely for her caring about me.

Let the “haters” hate. Just remember not to engage in the negativity of the moment. By moving on, and forgetting, you will keep your focus on what matters.

Like Michelle, I had my own run in with a hater. A woman refused to let my husband and I cut over a lane to turn into the mall. She rolled down the window to my husband off, but took her off guard when he yelled first, "You're beautiful! Happy Holidays!" I think it made her think twice about her crabby mood. She rolled up her window and let him in front of her.

Michelle, You are so right! It's so tempting to do, but don't let the haters ruin your day.


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.


This is a great post Cindy - another form of 'haters' are those that get the holiday blues and want the world to share in their misfortune. I try my best to turn the other cheek and let them know how many good things are going today. Afterall, where one door closes another one is bound to open, and people seem to forget that around the holidays.


Let your haters be your motivators. Great post Cindy.


Call me a 'hater' Cindy, or dare I say 'negative', but your blog is hogwash. People are stressed out because of the Xmas rush & shopping congestion. The notion that there is some value in repressing how you feel is pseudo-science. The appropriate response is to recognise the nature of any indignation. You call it 'hate', I call it people with 'narrow-minded' agendas. There is no hate involved.
How to get over it? Don't substitute others agendas or values for your own. Those people exist. The good news is that if you have good judgement, you don't have to marry them. But given that 50% of people get divorced, maybe they would steer a better course if they repudiated pseudo-science.

The comments to this entry are closed.