A friend of mine, a small business owner, puts her kids to bed and rushes to get back on her computer. I hear that scenerio a lot from women I interview who are raising families and either holding demanding jobs or running their own companies. For working moms, our priorities are work, kids and then our husbands.
It makes me wonder what the future holds. Can we keep our marriages strong when we relegate our spouses to the back burner?
Today, Lisa Belkin of The Huffington Post published a beautiful summary of the lessons she learned from 25 years of marriage.
Here's one pearl of wisdom Lisa shares that I particularly liked: "Having a first child means doing a gut renovation of your relationship; having a second child means rearranging some of the furniture."
I, too, have been married 25 years and have learned a lot along the way. With work and kids, it's not always easy to give my husband the attention he deserves. I'm guilty of spending too much time at night online. But I've discovered that it's being attentive to your spouse that makes a relationship strong. It's quality time that matters over quantity. Lately, I'm trying harder to find new ways to spend time with my husband, walking at night or sitting together on the sidelines at my kids' sports games.
This year, I've watched several of my friends become empty nesters. I'm terrified by the thought of having a quiet home. Yet, I see my friends enjoying more time with their spouses, trying new activities and bonding in new ways. I'm realizing the day will come when my dinner table will be occupied by just my husband and myself. That's hard to envision right now, but I know it lies ahead.
I'm thankful to Lisa Belkin today for reminding me that work pays the bills, success gives us satisfaction, kids bring us joy and spouses provide love.
Where does marriage fit into your juggling act?
Remember this lesson Lisa shares: "If you keep talking while the children are young, there will be lots to talk about after they've grown."