The Work/Life Balancing Act

Talking to girls about equal pay

As my daughter heads into her junior year of high school, she's starting to think about what career might interest her. I ask her questions, listen to her answers and try to give her hope that whatever profession she chooses, she will be happy. But will she be paid fairly?

It sickens me to think that one day my daughter may land the same job as one of her brothers, and get paid less to do it. How do you explain that to a young woman?

Today, an article caught my eye that reminded me that the next generation of women will inherit the need to fight for equal pay. What do they need to know to take on that battle?

They need to know who Lilly Ledbetter is and what she accomplished and why her name is associated with equal pay.

Lilly Ledbetter became a rare female manager in a man's industry in the 1980s, as a supervisor at the Goodyear Tire and Rubber plant in Alabama. She sued the company for paying her less than her male counterparts and took her lawsuit all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court. She lost because the court ruled that she should have filed suit within 180 days of her first unequal paycheck--despite the fact that she said she had no way of knowing that she was being paid unfairly all those years.

Her name has become well known because of the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act of 2009, which loosened the time frame in which people could file pay discrimination charges.

Today, I read a Workforce.com interview with Lilly Ledbetter, who now is 74 years old. I wanted to share some of the highlights:

 

 

Workforce: How have things changed in the workplace from the '80s and '90s to today regarding pay equality?

Ledbetter: Not enough. We still don't have enough women at the top. They're still being held back—and they've got great education. And we don't have enough women in politics, in Congress, either the House or the Senate in Washington. And the corporate boards don't have enough women or minorities on them to make a difference.

Things are changing. One of the things that makes me the happiest is to get invited to go speak to a group of new hires or a corporation about integrating women into their operations, and to encourage young high school and young college women and minorities to go into engineering, the sciences, mathematics—get those degrees. Companies are learning that the makeup of the workforce is so much stronger when they have both men and women.

The young men get it. I go to a lot of college campuses to talk. I'm almost as popular with the young men, because they talk about their mothers and their sisters—how they've been held back. I've heard so many examples. They understand when they get out of college, if they get married, they need a wife working, and they need her to be paid fairly too.

Workforce: What should employers know about equal pay?

Ledbetter: It's very simple. If you treat people fairly and equitably, you've got nothing to worry about. And it's also a win-win situation, because when employers make it pretty well-known that everybody's being treated equitably and fairly for their work, they have a better team. They have people who are more enthused about coming to work. They don't stay out of work. They can't wait to get there. If it's a service business, when you walk in it's hard to tell who the owner or the manager is because of the other team people working so hard. And if it's a manufacturing environment, they put out a better product—more productive, less scrap. And they don't stay out of work. The absentee and the safety records are almost perfect. It's just a 'win' situation for the families of this nation as well as the corporations and employers.

 

Over the next few months, we're going to hear political candidates debate on various topics. We will hear talk about women's issues, family issues and unemployment. We will hear candidates try to garner support with stories about how they were raised by single mothers and understand the plight of working mothers. I'd love to hear one of the explain to young women -- our nation's future mothers -- why they will graduate college, work hard, and still get paid less than a man.

My daughter recently asked me if women business owners and female executives pay their female employees the same as they do their male workers. I told her the truth: I don't know the answer. I'd like to confidently answer yes. But I can't.

Should I tell my daughter women are making progress in gaining equal pay? Just this June, the Senate failed get enough votes to advance the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would have required employers to demonstrate that any salary differences between men and women doing the same work are not gender-related. It also would have prohibited an employer from  retaliating against employees who share salary information with their co-workers.

To be sure, equal pay is gaining traction as a hot button issue. Clearly, Lilly knows we're not there yet and unfortunately my daughter now knows that too. But I told her what I hope other parents are telling their teenage daughters -- pursue on.

 

 

 

 

It's okay to ask for a sale

A friend of mine manages to get businesses to donate all kinds of raffle items to raise money for non-profits. I'm amazed and awed each time I see her in action. Her secret is pretty simple: she asks.

I hate asking people for things. I'm a lousy sales person, mostly because I hate rejection. That seems to be a problem most people face, but in business it can take you down. Spending hours networking and not turning that time into revenue can also wreak havoc on your work life balance.

On Friday, I learned a lot about asking for business and closing deals at the Women's Success Summit in Miami. Michelle Villalobos, a personal branding consultant and founder of the Summit, told me she picked the topic because she hears often about how challenging it is for women business owners to close a deal. "Women are excellent at networking and every piece of the sales process up until the time to close the deal." Michelle says we just have to get bolder about asking for business. We need to give ourselves permission to be fearless and more aggressive. "Everything else is a waste of time if we can't turn a relationship into revenue," she says.

At the Summit, sales guru Ivan Misner, founder of BNI, spoke about how women spend time building relationships with our dry cleaner, other women business owners or soccer parents and then we don't ask them to buy what we're selling. Examine who you have relationships with and whether they would want what you offer.

Listening to the statistics, I think closing the deal is hard for many men, too.

Here are some tips I picked up at the Summit:

* Target the customer who typically finds value in your product or services. Melissa Rubin sells high end condos for Platinum Properties. She networks in places where her best prospects circulate such as bar association meetings. By approaching the right customer, it takes away some of the fear of rejection, she says.

* Tap into an emotion. What are you selling that will help ease someone's pain? Jody Johnson, founder of Action Coaching, says people are more pain averse than pleasure seeking. Maybe you're selling something that will help a struggling business bleed less cash or maybe you're product that will help someone improve his or her marriage that's falling apart. Speak to their concerns when you ask for their business.

* Listen, watch, then ask questions. What a potential customer says or where he looks gives you signals for how to create a win-win. Jolie Glassman, owner of South Florida Boxing, says she formulates how she asks for the sale based on what someone says they want to accomplish and where they look when they enter the gym. "I get in their world and then I get them in mine," she says. At the end of her gym tour, she never asks the client directly if they want to sign up, rather she gives them two options that both assume they are going to register.

* Remove any impediments. Alex Lessa, speaker author and serial entrepreneur, says he used to sell martial arts memberships. When it would come time for the close, potential customers would say they didn't have their wallet buy a membership. So, Lessa began asking for a potential client's drivers license when he would enter and held it while they would do their trial workout. If you have your drivers license, you usually have your wallet!

* Sell your value. To avoid bickering over price, present your value and how the customer is going to benefit from doing business with you. "You can't establish price until you talk value," says Sebastian Rusk, founder of Social Buss TV and a Miami social media consultant,

* End with a question.Some people like to ask, "What do we need to do to get started? or "Would you like to pay all at once or in payments?" The key is not to close with a yes or no option but rather an option that has the client focus on when or how they are going to to follow through with your request.  Rusk says he will close by asking, "When would you like to get started?"

* Know when to walk away. If you just can't seem to close the deal, walk away. Natalie Boden, owner of BodenPR, a Miami public relations agency, says that's key in business. Usually, she presents her value in a way that the response is "When are you available?" But if the response isn't there and doesn't seem to be coming, she moves on.  

Below are some photos from the Women's Success Summit at the Miracle Theater in Coral Gables. If you missed it, don't fret. Michelle holds them every six month and chooses a different hot topic each time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nell Merlino, founder of Make Mine A Million, and Jessica Kizorek, founder of BadassBusinessWomen.org  

 

 

Natalie Boden, owner of BodenPR in Miami

 

 

 

 

Me and Michelle Villalobos, Summit Founder and Emcee

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lourdes "Luly" Balepogi, president of Chispa Marketing and her mom, an educational consultant.

Moms who start businesses

As you blew your New Year's horn, were you thinking about money? Were you wishing you could make more or save more?

I'm constantly coming up with business ideas that I'm convinced will make me millions. If only I was brave enough to launch full force into one and make it happen. Instead, I've written lots of articles about moms and dads who see a need for a product or service and turn that need into a money-making venture. All of them tell me coming up with the idea is the easy part.

Today's Miami Heraldtook a look at six local Mompreneurs and how they got their start. One of those moms watched people drinking water from plastic bottles and came up with the idea of putting water in cardboard juice boxes (a big plus for the environment!)

 I enjoyed reading how these moms came up with an idea, developed the product, shored up with the capital, figured out a marketing plan and devised a distribution channel. Their products include everything from water in box to personalized kids’ books that teach children about their heritage. I'm sure you will find their stories helpful if you're thinking of launching a business this year.

About a month ago, I interviewed Aliza Sherman, a successful serial entrepreneur, and Danielle Elliott Smith, founder of ExtraordinaryMommy, about their new book, Moms Incorporated. It's a guide to running a business  while negotiating the landscape of motherhood. It think it's a must-read. The book is loaded with the nitty-gritty details for how to make a home-based business work -- from incorporating to building your brand to paying taxes. Aliza and Danielle told me their goal was to help other moms avoid the missteps they encountered when launching their home-based businesses.

 

The first step, they say, is deciding which type of business is right for you -- a lifestyle business, an income business, a growing business, a go big business? Service or product-oriented? Your answer may depend on your schedule.

"You've got to be realistic. It's not going to be easy," Aliza says. "You're going to need to find the rhythm and the business that's right for you."

 

 

Some big lessons these women shared:

• Decide whether you want a business that will earn major dollars or a job/hobby (jobbie) that earns you some money on the side.
• Look for a business that has a low cost to entry. (They give some examples)
• Include your family members in the planning process
• Don't EVER hesitate to ask for help. Consider bartering.
• Carve out times when you can work without interruption
• Be prepared to give up your free time.

 

Readers, have you tried to launch a business from home? Did you encounter a misstep you would advise others to avoid?

Good luck to future Momtpreneurs and Happy New Year to all!

 

 

 

Zestra co-owners reveal how to attract investors, build a brand and raise kids

How do you get men to buy into a female sexual enhancement medication?

How do you create national attention for a brand, and still maintain work life balance?

Rachel Braun Scherl and Mary Wallace Jaensch, co-owners of Semprae Laboratories, which makes Zestra, have built an amazing business --- and learned some tough lessons.

Call them persistent, gutsy, determined – and balanced. These working moms took Zestra, out of bankruptcy, landed investors and have put the topical female sexual enhancement product on the shelves of major retail outlets such as Wal-Mart. This huge marketing effort has required raising kids and raising funds at the same time. It also has required that the two women bring attention to a category that’s been male-dominated by products like Viagra. I had an opportunity to speak with the women candidly about their success and their work life balancing act.

 

How did the two of you get involved with Zestra?

Rachel: When we bought Zestra out of bankruptcy, the product had been available for five years.  We had come out of a packaged goods background and became business partner in late 90s. We spent our careers listening to women talk through focus groups. We heard them talk around preventative health, but only recently heard conversations about sexual dissatisfaction. There’s an enormous need for Zestra - 43 percent of women across their reproductive lives have sexual concerns and difficulties.  

What has it been like to get the product a wider audience and attract funding for the company?

Mary: We had to learn about raising money and managing a company through bankruptcy so there would be assets left.  We worked 18 to 20 hour a day for three months. We targeted many investors, but interestingly, our lead investor is a female partner at a life sciences partnership. Our second investor also was a female partner at a leading institutional investor. Women get it faster and ultimately get more excited about it, so that’s where we found most of our money.

What’s your biggest challenge running the business and caring for your family?

Mary: We thought it couldn’t be harder running the business than buying it. At first, we were the only employees. We didn’t hire until 2009. Now we have 11 full time employees and three full time consultants. Initially our challenge was finding the right people. You have to have higher risk orientation to come to a venture-backed start up.  Our challenge now is getting access to channels to get our message to women.

Having a business partner can be risky. How do you two make it work?

Mary: Even though we are both co-founders and partners, we have slightly different titles. It’s important to be clear about our lines of responsibility. Rachel is outward facing. She leads the effort of getting our message to women.  I took the inward responsibility, making sure once we get to Zestra to the customer, her experience is positive.

Rachel:  In a partnership, you have to find someone you 100 percent trust and respect. Our strength is our partnership. We’re a united front. Having a the right partner is a key element to success . Building a company is hard work. When one of us slows down, the other picks up.

Mary, you’re the mother of three, and Rachel, you’re the mother of two. How do you find balance?

Mary: I think what also works for us is appreciation of the importance of our families in our lives. I would never suggest we have a balanced life, but we also have empathy and sympathy for each other’s personal lives. If someone needs more balance or has a family emergency, there’s no judgment whether it’s important or not.

What’s the most important ingredient in building a national brand?

Mary:  A balance between persistence and flexibility. You need to be focused on the outcome but flexible in how you get there.

Rachel: I would add – a sense of shamelessness. You need to be willing to call anyone and ask for anything. You have to have the confidence that nothing is out of reach. I used to be worried about asking for a nickel for my kids’ school. Now, I’m asking for millions without any reservations. You have to believe they will say yes.

What’s the vision for the future of your company?

Rachel: We’re looking at other products around sexual enhancement and health.  Initially, we are really trying to build a worldwide franchise around Zestra. Right now, a majority of sales are online, direct to consumers, while a much smaller portion is sold to consumers through brick-and-mortar retailers. We’re working on building relationships with our users to help  them find solutions for a broader range of their sexual health and wellness needs.

Avoiding the pink ghetto at work

 

  
I love Penelope Trunk, a blogger known as the Brazen Careerist. She provokes me. A few days ago, she made me think differently about what I do for a living. She made me ask myself: Would a man want to do it?

Penelope has noticed that it is women who write about work life balance, life at work and workplace issues. And that’s not good because where there are women there are lower salaries.

Penelope believes pay inequity is not because men get paid more for the same work. It’s that women choose to do different work -- we gravitate toward the pink ghetto. She writes on her BNET blog: "I interviewed Al Lee, the quantitative analysis genius who combs through salaries at PayScale, and among the fascinating things he told me was that women and men get paid similar amounts for similar work but that women pick lower-paying fields, and lower paying paths. Al says that the best thing women can do to increase their earning power is “to choose fields dominated by men right out of college.”

Just last week I had a conversation with a communications officer at UCF's graduate school of video gaming. He mentioned his grads are in demand, snapped up right away by companies offering big bucks. Sure enough, few women are going into the field.

A few weeks ago, Parade Magazine came out with its annual What People Earn edition. I noticed the high paying jobs, those that made in excess of $150,000 where held by men: a Fedex Pilot, an entertainment producer, a real estate agent to the stars.

Do we need to do a better job of steering young females into different professions?

I'm not a believer if forcing a young woman into a profession she has no interest, just for the pay. But college grad who is looking to earn a top salary or woman who wants to switch careers or departments within her company really needs to look where the men are clustered.

Now, let's look at the female dominated fields. Teaching has been disasterous. Teacher pay and benefits have been under attack for the last few years. It might be a great profession for working mothers but it's horrible for supporting a family. I think that might be where the problem lies, we're choosing balance over earning potential.

What do you think about the pink ghetto at work? Are women's choices -- the careers, departments, mentors and even the businesses we open  -- affecting our earning potential?

 

How to fit retirement savings into your work life balance

 
 
When Joanna Harris started her own South Florida business, CrunchCare, earlier this year, she kept a part time job for one reason: it gave her access to a retirement savings plan.
 
Unfortunately, most busy women don't even have retirement savings on their radar. We're juggling kids, jobs, elderly parents, spouses and housework. But a peek at the numbers are scary. Too many women are living their senior years in poverty. Less than half of women have any retirement savings. Most mothers today are living paycheck to paycheck or counting on our spouses to save for our golden years. But we need to change that because women earn less over our careers and we live longer. That means we will need more money to retire comfortably.
 
``Women think retirement savings is one of those things than can always wait,'' says Jan Knight, a financial services advisor with MML Investors Services, in Fort Lauderdale, a MassMutual subsidiary. ``All it takes is to just get started, baby steps.''
 
Here are a few tips to get started:
 
Know what you are spending. ``You can't invest if you don't have a surplus,'' Knight says. ``You need to figure out how to save a little, then you can talk about what's the right thing to do with that money.''
 
Make a retirement plan. Jane Hardwick, a certified retirement coach, says knowing what you want to do when you retire, where you want to live and who you will spend time with paves the way for figuring out how to get there.
 
Make retirement savings a priority. That may mean stashing away less for a child's college education. ``One of the best ways to help your kids is to put yourself in a position where you are financially OK in your own retirement,'' Hardwick says.
 
Start young. Women need to start saving sooner than men, as early as their 20s, because by the time they retire they will most likely have been in the workforce 13 fewer years than men, experts say. Financial advisors recommend stashing away 10 percent of your paycheck when you are young and as much as 30 percent when you reach your 60s.

Seek out advice. Look into free classes at community banks or ask for a consultation with a financial planner with the goal of trying to demystify the savings process.

Look into all available retirement savings plans. If you're working, save as much as you can in your company's retirement plan, or in an IRA in which you can make tax-deductible contributions. Most women have to invest more aggressively than men. The average individual balance for men (including all IRA types) was $91,000, while for women it was $51,000. Men also contribute more to Social Security because they are less likely to take time off from their careers.

Check financial statements regularly and readjust as necessary.

If you are like most women, you plan to think about retirement savings later...But later is now!
 

Why employee rewards don't work

Years ago, I had an editor who gave reporters a bonus if he thought we wrote a well reported story. That was a nice perk but most of us would strive for a well reported story even without the bonus.

Would it surprise you to learn that there is not a single study that has shown an improvement in the quality of work as a result of any reward system?

In fact, according to Alfie Kohn, researcher and author of Punished by Rewards, the more employers use rewards to motivate employees, the more they tend to lose interest in whatever they had to do to get the rewards.

So what does it take to motivate employees? Kohn says the best reward is the job itself. Pay a decent salary, assign interesting tasks, create a sense of community and give employees a  chance to participate in making decisions. He says employees that have those things rarely choose to go back to a place where employees get rewards. He says pay people fairly, then do everything possible to take money off their minds.

Of course, there are consultants who insist that rewards systems work and there are employees who say they will do just about anything to be rewarded with time off.

Today, I asked Dan Hoffman, CEO of NYC-based M5 Networks and a forward thinking leader, what he thought of motivating employees by using rewards. “I think it’s dangerous to tie people to a number and put cash next to it. I view rewards as way to communicate what’s important.”

For example, he says, his company had a contest to find example of the best way to tell someone bad news. He sent the winner to space camp for weekend. (Sounds cool!) That’s a reward he says his employees go nuts for "but it’s also a message that this is a fun place to work," Hoffman says.

That’s different than using rewards to as incentives for people to work hard, he explained to me. "We also pay a bounty to anyone that helps us recruit. It’s our way of sending the message that good people are important and we want to hire your friends."

I wonder if the recession has changed how employees view rewards. When our paychecks have been cut, will cash rewards motivate us differently than in the past?

What do you think about rewards? Do you find them motivating?

Give your marriage some oomph

 
Have you ever written a check or racked up charge knowing that your spouse isn't going to be happy about whatever it is you are buying? Admit it, we've all done it at least once. But don't you think that being on the same page as your spouse when it comes to money would help give your marriage some oomph?

When you get married, it's unlikely anyone will they tell you that relationships struggle when a wife out earns her husband or when you argue over who spends money and what you spend it on. I can tell you that fighting with your spouse over money is time consuming and draining -- a real impediment to work life balance. Today, Larry Tobin weighs in on the subject of balancing work, marriage and finances. Tobin, co-founder of Habit Changer, is an expert on the awareness of habits with a specialty in how to change them.

Different upbringings, work ethics and hours at the office can create habits we each bring into our relationship. These deep-rooted habits can create wedges and lead to resentment over an imbalance in earning power, control of the check book, or simply figuring out how to financially plan for the future.

Changing these old habits will help you eliminate fights over money. Here are some tips:

Make time for your spouse. Try expressing how you feel about your partner in a way that they will appreciate without spending a dime. Small things like taking the morning off to make breakfast for your partner or simply leaving a sweet note in their briefcase that says you love them go a long way.

Keep a private fund. You work hard and deserve to spend your hard-earned money on yourself from time to time. Try setting up a private fund, placing aside $50 or $100 each for you to spend on yourselves in any way you choose. Spend it as you please, no questions asked.

Be Open. In today’s economy, many of us aren’t earning the same salary we may have been used to. Commissions are down and bonus checks are low. As things scale back, putting yourself out there can feel a little risky, but as a team, couples need to have the tools in place to prepare for the long haul. Remember, financial facts are just numbers. But secrets can hold you back. When you air them, they lose their control over you.

A healthy home life promotes a healthy work life- but it takes your desire and the proper tools to help you break loose of the money habits that impact your relationships. Want to start changing your habits today? Take this fun quiz with your partner to discover how your spending habits differ and what it means to your relationship.

 

  Larry Tobin, co-founder of Habit Changer

Who feels stressed? Is your hand up?

Last week in my Miami Herald column, I wrote that workplace stress levels are at an all time high. Many employers could care less about their stressed out workers and it's causing people to have meltdowns in the office.

For years, experts have said a little bit of stress is good, referring to the short-term jolt that comes before making a presentation, not the extreme kind prevalent in workplaces today. ``We're way beyond the level of it being motivating,'' says Helen Darling, president of the Washington-based National Business Group on Health.

Today, I find out that I live in one of the most stressful places in the country. Miami-Fort Lauderdale ranked among the 10 most stressful metropolitan areas in America, according to a study conducted by the South Florida Business Journal. Portfolio.com and bizjournals created a 10-part formula to estimate the stress levels in the nation’s 50 biggest metro areas, using the latest data available from several government agencies and private firms on factors including unemployment, poverty, crime and traffic, and how many sunny days a city has.

Markets with high stress: Detroit, Los Angeles, Cleveland; California’s Riverside; St. Louis; New York City; New Orleans; Chicago; Birmingham, Ala.; and Miami-Fort Lauderdale.

Markets with low levels of stress are Salt Lake City, Minneapolis-St. Paul; Raleigh, N.C.; Austin, Texas; Oklahoma City; Denver; San Antonio; Kansas City and Phoenix.

Click here to read the complete list.

Some people have told me the are turning to yoga for help with stress. September happens to be National Yoga Month. Many local yoga centers are offering discounts or free classes. CEO Walid Wahab, a Miami homebuilder, says it has been key to keeping him focused on the job.

There are many different opinions regarding what a stress management programs should include. Some stressed-out workers have turned to medication; others have gone the route of meditation. I pretty sure many people are doing nothing and walking around ready to snap at any given moment.

How do you keep your stress levels down? Do you feel like you are more stressed than you were a year ago?

 

 

 

Money can't buy love, but what about happiness?

 You are plodding along, giving your company your all, and balm out of no where your boss asks you to take a pay cut. This didn't actually happen to me but it happened to many of my colleagues and it stinks.

Now I look at them and wonder....does less money make them less happy in the long run?

Let's face it, those who make more money have an advantage in the work/life balance arena. They can afford a nanny, a reliable means of transportation, convenience services like dog walkers and take-out meals. It also can ease financial stress which often causes fights among spouses.

A new Gallup study  puts things in perspective and guess what? Pulling in the big bucks makes people more likely to say they are happy with their lives overall -- whether they are young or old, male or female, or living in cities or remote villages, the survey of more than 136,000 people in 132 countries found. 

While big bucks can lead to satisfaction, positive feelings are less affected by money and more affected by feeling respected, in control of your life and having friends and family. Most of us want both, respect, friends and family and the big bucks.

"When people evaluate their life, they compare themselves to a standard of what a successful life is, and it turns out that standard tends to be universal: People in Togo and Denmark have the same idea of what a good life is, and a lot of that has to do with money and material prosperity," said Daniel Kahneman, a professor emeritus of psychology and public affairs at Princeton University. "That was unexpected."

As noted in the Washington Post, pprevious studies had suggested that money was associated with happiness. But the relationship appeared weak, and earlier work tended to focus on individual countries without examining differences across nations.The new survey -- the first large international study to differentiate between overall life satisfaction and day-to-day emotions -- makes that crucial distinction, allowing researchers to explore the elusive concept of happiness in much greater nuance. 

 

I look at it a little differently. I don't necessarily believe being a billionaire makes you happier but I do think being financially comfortable does.  What do you think? Does a big income mean happier days?