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Star Jones, twinkling again

I know, I know. You miss Star Jones. You miss her incisive foreign policy analysis. (She once said on The View that we went to war against Afghanistan not over that piddling matter of the World Trade Center, but because George Bush wanted to prove he had a bigger penis than Osama bin Laden.) Starjones You miss her peerless dedication to the cause of conspicuous consumption. (Her 2004 wedding had more than 30 corporate sponsors.) You miss the shameless plugs for anybody who gives her freebies. (Not just on her show, but in stories about her.) Well, your wish is Court TV's command. She's getting an hour-long daily show there later this year where, the cable net says, "Reynolds will empower viewers by asking the questions everyone wants to ask and get the answers everyone wants to know." Like, where did you get that fabulous diamond necklace, and how big is George Bush's penis, anyway?


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These are people, things, and body parts that I never want to see next to each other in a sentence ever again!

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