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13 posts from July 2007

July 29, 2007

Would you bet on Tebow to win the Heisman? Some are

GAINESVILLE -- Tim Tebow is yet to start his first collegiate football game. Would you bet money that he would win the Heisman Trophy this season? Some online betting websites have placed the odds on the sophomore winning the Heisman at 6-to-1. Other websites set the odds at 9-to-1. Sounds pretty high to me. Skybet.com gives Tebow 14-to-1 chance to win. Sportsbet.com places Tebow's odds at 9-to-1 and gives Percy Harvin 17-to-1 odds to win the Heisman. Most online betting websites favor West Virginia quarterback Steve Slaton or Arkansas running back Darren McFadden to win the Heisman Trophy.


July 27, 2007

Emails I get: Comparing Gators to Supermodels

I recently referred to Florida's last two recruiting classes as "above-average" in an article. This email comes to us from The Homeboy.

Above Average???
That's like calling Halle Berry, Charlize Theron and Catherine Zeta Jones ... "above average" ...
a better description ... TOP RATED!
-The Homeboy, Miami
Halle Berry
Catherine Zeta Jones
Charlize Theron
Umm, not quite, The Homeboy, but we get your point.

Florida picked to finish first in SEC East

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Despite only returning two players on defense, starting a sophomore quarterback and competing with just 10 seniors and 10 juniors, Florida was picked by sports writers to win the SEC East here at the SEC media days. LSU was picked to win the SEC. I didn't vote in this poll. I don't feel like I know enough about the conference yet to make an informed opinion. Also, I don't take myself that seriously...as I you might already know. Just a couple questions before I type out the poll. No.1 Who the heck picked South Carolina to win the SEC East and Alabama to win the West?

SEC champion: LSU (54), Florida (7), Arkansas (5), Auburn (4), Alabama (3), South Carolina (3), Tennessee (2), Georgia (2)

Eastern Division: Florida (41), Tennessee (16), Georgia (12), South Carolina (11), Kentucky, Vanderbilt

Western Division: LSU (63), Auburn (5), Arkansas (5), Alabama (7), Ole Miss, Mississippi State

Florida lands six on preseason all-SEC teams

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Florida only returns two players on defense but both players are among the SEC's best. That's what the media decided on Friday morning. Junior defensive lineman Derrick Harvey (first team) and senior defensive back Tony Joiner (second team) and were among six Gators selected by writers to the preseason all-SEC teams. Here are the lists...


TE Jacob Tamme, Kentucky

OL Will Arnold, LSU

OL Michael Oher, Ole Miss

OL Andre Smith, Alabama

OL Phil Trautwein, Florida

C Jonathan Luigs, Arkansas

WR Earl Bennett, Vanderbilt

WE Marcus Monk, Arkansas

QB Andre’ Woodson, Kentucky

RB Darren McFadden, Arkansas

RB Felix Jones, Arkansas



TE Cornelius Ingram, Florida

OL Chris Williams, Vanderbilt

OL King Dunlap, Auburn

OL Drew Miller, Florida

OL Brian Stamper, Vanderbilt

C Antoine Caldwell, Alabama

WR Percy Harvin, Florida

WR Keenan Burton, Kentucky

WR Early Doucet, LSU

QB Erik Ainge, Tennessee

RB BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Ole Miss

RB LaMarcus Coker, Tennessee



DL Glenn Dorsey, LSU

DL Quentin Groves, Auburn

DL Derrick Harvey, Florida

LB Jasper Brinkley, South Carolina

LB Jonathan Goff, Vanderbilt

LB Ali Highsmith, LSU

LB Jerod Mayo, Tennessee

DB Simeon Castille, Alabama

DB Jonathan Hefney, Tennessee

DB Chevis Jackson, LSU

DB Derek Pegues, Mississippi State



DL Titus Brown, Mississippi State

DL Tyson Jackson, LSU

DL Wallace Gilberry, Alabama

LB Wesley Woodyard, Kentucky

LB Prince Hall, Alabama

LB Darry Beckwith, LSU

LB Brandon Miller, Georgia

DB Tony Joiner, Florida

DB Jonathan Lindley, Kentucky

DB Trevard Lindley, Kentucky

DB Jonathan Wilhite, Auburn



PK Ryan Succop, South Carolina

P Britton Colquitt, Tennessee

RS Felix Jones, Arkansas


PK Brandon Coutu, Georgia

P Ryan Succop, South Carolina

RS Rafael Little, Kentucky

Richt enjoying lack of responsibilities

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Votes are in ... Georgia coach Mark Richt has the worst hair cut in the Deep South. Think Lloyd Christmas (Dumb & Dumber) but parted down the middle. Other than the hair, the Bulldogs' coach seemed upbeat. Considering he went 1-4 in the SEC East last season, that was a bit surprising. Richt says he's happy to not be calling the offensive plays anymore. I don't believe that for a second. But Richt needed to make a few changes to pacify the vultures that begin circling after a four-loss season. 

Lloyd "Mark Richt" Christmas

July 26, 2007

Meyer asked reporter to punch me in the mouth

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- First things first. Since the SEC media days are really just one big promotional event for the conference and nothing substantial (news or otherwise) ever comes from them, let's start by saying that Urban Meyer has been the event's best dressed coach ... he must'a just got a big raise or something.

I offer Meyer this compliment to smooth over any hard feelings the coach might already harbor towards me. This is a joke, of course. Meyer could care less. But, I was a bit alarmed when, during the middle of Meyer's press conference today, he asked another reporter to turn around punch me in the mouth. Here's why...

ME: What is the plan if Tim Tebow gets hurt?
Dsc00611 COACH MEYER: Ooh. Turn around and punch him right in the mouth, will you (smiling)? Next question. I don't know. Make sure your punter...
No, the first time that I've been on a staff, we have four quality quarterbacks. We have Johnny Brantley from Ocala. You have Cameron Newton. You got Bryan Waggener. We have three guys. That's another battle we're looking forward to.
Cam Newton has a bit of an upper hand because he went through spring practice. We also direct snap it to other people. We try to be a bit creative at that position.
[Tebow getting hurt is] something that is going ... for that to happen would hurt our chances significantly at being successful.


Saban talks about being poor

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Saban just asked a reporter a question: "I actually took a pay cut. Did they put that in [the article]?"

Saban's parting words to the media: "We look forward to seeing you throughout the year and we certainly thank you for your time."


Saban tells the truth

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Saban just said this: "I never tried to leave Miami."


Saban says 'trust' and 'respect'

Blogging live from SEC media days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Saban is talking. The first thing he did was thank the media for doing our jobs. Now he's telling reporters that they know more about his team than he does. Is this REALLY  a new Saban? Oh, never mind, he just said the words "trust" and "respect" to describe himself. And now he's saying that he can't answer any questions about his team.


July 25, 2007

Quote of the Day ...

Blogging live from SEC media days...

This nugget of genius was offered from Auburn defensive end Quintin Groves: "You can go to the club and not get drunk at the club. That's what I've learned at Auburn."

Quentin Groves

Spurrier revelations on Florida years; Clemson bashing;Hog envy

Blogging live from the SEC Media Days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS YOU SHOULD READ: South Carolina coach Steve Dsc00600 Spurrier is on the podium here at the Wynfrey Hotel and just said that he won some SEC championships while at Florida without the best talent in the league...He then indirectly blamed losses last season on officials, which drew laughs from a lot of fat and very white sports writers. "There has been a few games that deserved an investigation," he said. Wink-Wink-Wink!! Spurrier then took a shot at instate rival Clemson. "We thought we did something big by beating Clemson but then Kentucky beat them."

In related news, Arkansas coach Houston Nutt said, "We had [Florida] on the ropes." ... But didn't Arkansas have everyone "on the ropes" last year.


Florida goes vinyl; Tebow makes the back cover; Saban issues a statement

Blogging live from SEC Media Days...

HOOVER, Ala. -- Gator Clause is sitting in the main ballroom of the Wynfrey Hotel and wondering why the sound check guy is counting to 60, 61, 62...Maybe that's the number of Southeastern Conference football players that will be arrested this year...The current pace sets the final tally somewhere between 100 and 12,038.

Right now, AS I TYPE, sports writers are debating the purpose of media guides!!! What a thrill this day will be. Media guides, as you know, are sports writers' holy bibles. Without them, we would know absolutely nothing about sports...

Dsc00595 A few highlights of this season's SEC media guides...Florida's media guide appears to be the most expensive. It's the only media guide with a plastic cover. And not a cheap plastic either -- the grooved, faux vinyl plastic that sounds like a record skipping (or a D.J. cut'n those turntables) when you scratch it. This is all we need...sports writers mixing hip-hop tracks all season long. The front of Florida's media guide features a three-image hologram commemorating the national championship. On the back is another three-image hologram from the national championship game -- Tim Tebow scrambling, Tim Tebow throwing and Andre Caldwell catching a touchdown. In making the back cover of the media guide in just his sophomore season, Tim Tebow now has the opportunity to set a collegiate national media guide record for most appearances in a career.

Ole Miss' media guide offers its fans a positive outlook on the season with the words "Never Quit" on its cover. Kind of ironic since Brent Schaeffer is the Rebels' quarterback. Since his freshman year of high school, Mr. Schaeffer (Deerfield Beach) has never been at a school for more than two years...

Dsc00594 Alabama's media guide features a larger-than-life picture of Nick Saban (god complex) imposed atop Bryant-Denny Stadium. At the bottom of the cover reads three words, "The process begins." This is a funny statement when read through the eyes of a South Floridian. The back of the media guide is even better. It's another picture of Saban. (That's correct. There are no players on Alabama's media guide. Only Saban.) Saban is shouting the Crimson Tide's new Saban "Mission Statement." The first tenant of this four-pronged manifesto is "Character Development." An excerpt: "The principles and values that we're able to develop with [the players] allow success relative to the character and attitude they have as a football player here at this institution." Sounds all well and good, but Saban (of all people) should know that relativism is a dangerous business.


July 23, 2007

On the eve of SEC Media Days...Tebow rescues a small child

GAINESVILLE -- Gator Clause resumes today...amid fanfare...there was a parade. The first order of business before we fly to Birmingham, Ala., for the annual SEC Media Days? A Gator Clause refresher course for those who have been away (this includes me, who just returned from vacation). I was in Birmingham, coincidentally.

MISSION STATEMENT: This small slice of the Internet is here for you, the Florida Gators fan, to receive minute-to-minute updates of every move made by Tim Tebow...For example: Tim Tebow awoke today and bear crawled 15 miles uphill. Until this morning, such an act was impossible. (Naturally, there are no hills in this state that stretch for 15 miles). But Tebow pushed back the earth and made a mountain. Along the way he stopped to save a small child from a burning building. Once back at home, Tebow opened a few letters from his loyal fans. Here are a few examples:

Dear Mr. Tebow,

Nicholas and I decided to name our child after you. You're the best!!!


Mrs. Saban


Dear Timmy,

Just wantd to say that me and the old ladey can't weight to watch you scoar touchdowns aginst the Tennisee Vols! What tyme can we expect you for dinr?

Yer No.1 fan,



Dear Mr. Tebow,

Thank for you persuading me to stay on as the basketball coach here at school. What time can we expect you for dinner?


Billy D.


Dear Mr. Tebow,

Thank you again for redirecting the latest hurricane. That last one gave us a scare. When you get a chance, we've got some baby dolphins that need saving.

Your friend,

NOAA/ National Weather Service
National Centers for Environmental Prediction
National Hurricane Center
Tropical Prediction Center
11691 SW 17th Street
Miami, Florida, 33165-2149 USA


In addition to covering Tim Tebow, Gator Clause is dedicated to bringing you the lighter side of the Florida Gators beat. Sure, we'll have all that IMPORTANT news everybody else writes about. But you can also find stuff like this, (which actually DOES put you inside the Florida Gators locker room)...

Every Monday during the football season, Gator Clause will accept questions from Gators fans regarding the football team. Here's the fun part. I'll pick the best question and ask head coach Urban Meyer (During a press conference!!!) to answer your question. For example:

"Coach Meyer: Joseph Goodman with The Miami Herald. Manny Rameriz of Weston is a lifelong Gator fan and a dedicated reader of my blog, Gator Clause. He wanted me to ask you why you didn't go for it on fourth-and-inches from your own 20-yard line?"


IMPORTANT NEWS UPDATE: Former Gators running back Emmitt Smith was recently inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame. The Pensacola native is the seventh Gator to be inducted and the first since former Florida football coach Doug Dickey in 2003.

Off to Birmingham...Gator Clause will be blogging live from the event throughout the week. Check back often and shoot me some comments.




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