Here's an innovative use of the Internet: A 27-year-old straight guy -- recently fired from his Wall Street job and $32,000 in debt -- is auctioning off his "gay virginity."
This is spreading across the Internet today and folks online are speculating that it probably is for real ...
27-year-old Wall Street Casualty Auctioning Off My "Gay Virginity"
Who am I?
I am a 27-year-old straight white male living in New York City. I'm currently unemployed, having recently lost my position as a Business Analyst at a big 5 investment bank on Wall Street.
What am I offering?
I am looking to LEGALLY give my "gay virginity" to the highest bidder while retaining anonymity for both myself and the winner of the auction. (Please see legal terms and stipulations below)
Why am I doing this?
In 2008, I was laid-off from my mid-tier position on Wall St. When I lost this position I had 28k in credit card debt. After some time of being unable to land another job, I now have over 32k in credit card debt. See "My Story" section below for the details on how exactly this happened.
What do I look like?
I am 5ft 11 inches tall and I weigh 155 pounds. I have brown hair with brown eyes. I'm a white male with a slim but toned build. It's hard to say this without sounding arrogant because I'm not an arrogant guy, but since I'm (literally) trying to sell myself here, I obviously need to be very candid so let me say that I'm a very good looking guy. I've had a bigger-than-average number of very good looking girlfriends over the years. The two celebrities that people most frequently say I look like are "Adam Brody" from the show "The OC" and a guy who started in a movie I've never seen called "Spanking The Monkey"
Where can you see pictures of me?
You can't yet and I'm sorry but I think you can pretty much figure out why. The highest bidders will be able to see what I look like to decide on their final bids. I do assure you I'm very good looking (sorry again to sound arrogant) but if you are one of the high bidders and you see me and for any reason you don't think I'm great looking or I'm not your type, or anything at all, then it's no problem whatsoever, consider your bid non-binding. No questions asked and I promise my feelings won't be hurt.
What explicitly does "gay virginity" entail?
I am not homophobic but I myself am not gay. Put simply, I have never kissed another man or touched another man's penis, period. If necessary as was suggested by the other recent virgin auction, I am willing to take a polygraph test to prove the fact that I am not gay and have never had gay sex of any kind.
What I am explicitly offering as part of this auction is the following - I will wear the same suit that I wore at my job interview at my ex-firm. I will meet the winner in a 100% LEGAL setting such as either at a licensed brothel in Nevada or Rhode Island, and I will spend some time having a drink with them, hanging out with them, laughing, breaking the ice, and so on.
Afterwards, I will deliver what I would consider to be the ideal blowjob / handjob combination until the winner has an orgasm or 30 minutes passes whichever comes first.
Sorry but no anal activity of any kind is part of this offer!
Is this legal?
It has to be or I won't do it! 100% LEGALITY and ANONYMITY come before anything else. I'm consulting an authority on the subject and I will ONLY conduct this auction and the exchange of money and sexual services in an environment which is 100% legal.
THIS OFFER DOES NOT CONSTITUTE SOLICITATION and is hereby VOID WHERE PROHIBITED. NO LAW WILL BE BROKEN ON THIS SITE OR AS A RESULT OF THIS AUCTION. ALL TAXES ON THE WINNING BID WILL BE PAID, ALL FEDERAL AND LOCAL LAWS WILL BE ADHERED TO WITH STRICT ALLEGIANCE.
Can you guarantee anonymity?
We have to guarantee anonymity or I won't carry out the auction or exchange. If my identity were discovered, or my family, friends, and colleagues discovered that I was doing this, my life would be ruined. If you bid on this auction you certify that you are legitimately interested in my offer and not a member of the media, law enforcement, or anyone exploiting my situation for anything other than a legitimate interest in what I have to offer.
Until recently I was an Associate Business Analyst at a major big 5 investment bank that has been featured prominently in the international news media over the last two weeks. At that time I was offered a proactive severance package and was told that if I didn't accept it there would be a high probability that I would be laid off anyway in the coming months, and that if this happened, the best I'd be able to hope for would be about a quarter of what I was being offered that day. I was given no time to consider their offer, it was take it or leave it. I took the deal.
In the last 3 years during my employment I have lived like an absolute idiot, spending money that I didn't have in order to impress the front office brokers that I worked with and who held the keys to big bonuses. Unfortunately, I won't see a 2008 bonus (neither will they at this point!!) When I read about Natalie Dylan's virgin auction, I thought to myself, why not me too! I can't say I'm aching to give my "gay virginity" away, but the idea doesn't completely disgust me like it does for most guys that I know.
I can't say I'm proud of my decision, because I obviously wouldn't want anyone to find out, but I think that given my circumstances, it's a completely viable and respectable way out of an extremely tough situation which could otherwise go on and on and on for god knows how long. I don't think the economy is headed anywhere good and even if it was I don't see Wall Street as aggressively looking to hire a mid level guy like myself anytime in the near future. It is an enormously bleak situation and this is a real way out.
Again, I do swear that I am a very "hot" guy (still feel awful saying that) as you will find out if you are a high bidder and see what I look like. Again, completely non-binding bid if you don't think I'm "hot" and aren't interested no problem.
If you do think you might be interested please do get in touch with me. I'm happy to discuss anything about the situation you might have questions about. Nothing will be final until we are both comfortable. If you've never been in this kind of situation before don't worry, neither have I, obviously, and I'm sure we can work together to make it very relaxed, profitable, and enjoyable.
Thanks again and please email if you're so inclined -
(not)Gay Virgin - email@example.com